It would help to explain why MIL (who wants us to split) said to me recently how calm I've been and gave me a big hug... and yet I've barely seen her for months. Amazing chance that I now know the recording device.
I went for a walk today and by another amazing chance W went past in the car... she is still supposed to be away on a break (and had offered to call as soon as they got back but hasn't).
By chance, it happened right in front of a local church leader who I'd never spoken to before. Part of my GAL plan is to do some boating. I spoke to the church leader for a while. They have a boat. I asked if I could borrow it. They agreed. GAL.
It's been a weird few days off coincidences considering I had also bumped into the sibling of FIL by chance who I'd not seen for years and they guessed right away the FIL was involved etc. We are meeting tomorrow.
It would help to explain why MIL (who wants us to split) said to me recently how calm I've been and gave me a big hug... and yet I've barely seen her for months.
How do you know MIL wants you to split? Did you do something so horrendous to your W that your IL's despise you? Stop trying to read the minds of everyone involved.
Originally Posted by DavidUK
Amazing chance that I now know the recording device.
When speaking to her you should always assume you are being recorded, this will help you keep your cool.
Originally Posted by DavidUK
I went for a walk today and by another amazing chance W went past in the car... she is still supposed to be away on a break (and had offered to call as soon as they got back but hasn't).
So you are 100% certain it was W, she is away but decided that she would drive by just to see what you were doing? Listen clearly, you need to focus on you, right now you do not pay any mind to your W. She wants nothing to do with you...for now.
Originally Posted by DavidUK
Part of my GAL plan is to do some boating. I spoke to the church leader for a while. They have a boat. I asked if I could borrow it. They agreed. GAL.
This is good if its going to happen, unfortunately I see a lot of generalizations in your thread, By chance, i might, I was thinking, a legal person....etc.... this will not work set a plan and follow through. Boating is great but you could start with something like going to play some darts.
Originally Posted by DavidUK
It's been a weird few days off coincidences considering I had also bumped into the sibling of FIL by chance who I'd not seen for years and they guessed right away the FIL was involved etc. We are meeting tomorrow
You will never heal if you keep trying to cast blame for others on your sitch, man up right now. Listen to those of us who have gone through it, you will feel empowered if you take back your life. You may or may not save your marraige.... its time to save yourself.
M:52 W:49 D:26 S:24 S:23 D:20 ILYBNILWY 5/28/17 Still living together W filed 1/5/18 W moved out 8/24/18 D final 9/18/20
I went for a walk last night... and W was going past in the car by chance... yet again! W stopped and asked where I was going. I avoided saying. W said we needed to talk soon to try to get along better for the kids sake. W said she was now a different person. W said she wasn't seeing anyone but had been asked out on dates but had not been on any and people had suggested going on Tinder. W said a few times how good my hair looked (first time she had seen the new, new style) and that she thought the kids would really like it.
I feel OK about myself at the moment because I'm a good person whatever happens. I can't thank people enough for their wonderful help and support. Thanks!
Well, that appears to be quite the turn around. However the advice seems to be to keep doing what you are doing and ignore attempts to reel you back in.
Yep, keep doing what I've been doing is about all I can do... but I will try to do it better.
I found out some info that W has told me a massive lie for a couple of years about money. W has had to live with that guilt and it would tie-in with her making less effort etc. in our MR since then. It could make a difference to my settlement in any possibe D.
