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mtb my feeling would be that as an alpha you don't reward bad behavior but just letting it go unnoticed. that is my 2 cents but I would like the more seasoned vets to tune in. Stay well!


M51 w50
T-20Yrs M-16Yrs
S15- mad at W for not trying and giving up
1 Awesum dog
BD 10/31/17
separate rooms 02/08/18
wife moved out 05/17/18

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mtb1981 Offline OP
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Originally Posted By: LoneWlf
mtb my feeling would be that as an alpha you don't reward bad behavior but just letting it go unnoticed. that is my 2 cents but I would like the more seasoned vets to tune in. Stay well!

That's kind of what I was thinking too. But I also don't want to reward her by giving her attention...


Me: 38
W:31
Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4
M: 10 years
T:12 years
BD:Jan 3, 2018
W moved out: Apr 13,2018
Filed for D: Jun 2018
D final: Sep 2019

"Surrender to the Flow"...
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I also heard from another friend that she's going around showing the screenshot of the snapchat video of her sleeping I mentioned in an earlier thread and telling people that I broke in her house and took that video. I'm nearly 100% positive she took it herself. The caption metioned she always liked to sleep with her head covered, so you couldn't even see anyone in the screenshot. Weird thing is, she's extremely claustrophobic and wouldn't sleep with her head covered, but it sure makes a good story and pretty easy to take the video herself to send to OM to get his attention and make me look bad. I'm just getting tired of her running my name through the mud...


Me: 38
W:31
Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4
M: 10 years
T:12 years
BD:Jan 3, 2018
W moved out: Apr 13,2018
Filed for D: Jun 2018
D final: Sep 2019

"Surrender to the Flow"...
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Wow, that s crazy town stuff. I can t understand her reasons for doing that....I guess making you look bad makes her feel better about her crappy decisions, but if she knows she s LYING about it? That, I don t get at all. I guess that s why they tell you here not to try to make sense of what the WAS does...because it doesn t make sense and in the meantime you make yourself crazy trying to make sense of their crazy.

Last edited by Cadet; 06/09/18 04:27 AM. Reason: restored post

M: 43, H: 44
Married 18 yrs, Together 26 yrs
S17, D15, D8, S6
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Wow, thats crazy town stuff. I cant understand her reasons for doing that....I guess making you look bad makes her feel better about her crappy decisions, but if she knows shes LYING about it? That, I dont get at all. I guess thats why they tell you here not to try to make sense of what the WAS does...because it doesnt make sense and in the meantime you make yourself crazy trying to make sense of their crazy.


M: 43, H: 44
Married 18 yrs, Together 26 yrs
S17, D15, D8, S6
Still living in MH
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mtb1981 Offline OP
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Originally Posted By: HelenaJ
Wow, thats crazy town stuff. I cant understand her reasons for doing that....I guess making you look bad makes her feel better about her crappy decisions, but if she knows shes LYING about it? That, I dont get at all. I guess thats why they tell you here not to try to make sense of what the WAS does...because it doesnt make sense and in the meantime you make yourself crazy trying to make sense of their crazy.

The only way I can make sense of it is that she can't get what she wants (sympathy and attention) by going around saying "I walked out on my husband and kids so I could cheat and do drugs. I have seen my kids for a combined time of 20 hours in the past 6 months" Instead she uses "my husband is crazy. He beats me, abuses the kids, and breaks into my house to take videos of me" because that gets her the attention she wants. Also probably helps alleviate any guilt...


Me: 38
W:31
Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4
M: 10 years
T:12 years
BD:Jan 3, 2018
W moved out: Apr 13,2018
Filed for D: Jun 2018
D final: Sep 2019

"Surrender to the Flow"...
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Originally Posted By: mtb1981
I was wondering... The next time I talk to W do I bring up the fact that she is making these false accusations against me and call her out, or do I just ignore it?...


It will look like you're keeping tabs on her...if she brings up the subject then address IMO.


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
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She's so dumb. Who desserts their kids if they are being abused? "MTB beats me and the kids so I left my kids with him. " Of course a lying druggie doesn't think things through too well.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
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Originally Posted By: Steve85
She's so dumb. Who desserts their kids if they are being abused? "MTB beats me and the kids so I left my kids with him. " Of course a lying druggie doesn't think things through too well.

My thoughts exactly, Steve. She's not doing herself any favors. Getting validation from her new friends as a trade off for looking foolish when we finally go to court. Surely the court system will see right through it all when the time comes...


Me: 38
W:31
Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4
M: 10 years
T:12 years
BD:Jan 3, 2018
W moved out: Apr 13,2018
Filed for D: Jun 2018
D final: Sep 2019

"Surrender to the Flow"...
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Been having a hard time detaching lately. WW has been on my mind a lot lately. Had dreams about her the past several nights. In some, she comes back very remorseful and we work things out, and in others she's very cold and still cheating. Always wake up during the dreams with a horrible feeling of missing her. I can't understand how I can have feelings for someone that is treating me so badly and saying such awful things about me. I know for certain I have no desire to be with the woman she has become, but I guess buried deep inside me there has to be some little spark of hope that I can't seem to extinguish...


Me: 38
W:31
Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4
M: 10 years
T:12 years
BD:Jan 3, 2018
W moved out: Apr 13,2018
Filed for D: Jun 2018
D final: Sep 2019

"Surrender to the Flow"...
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