I did. and when I did I didn't want to. Now im resolved to be free of this mess. If R is ever a possibility, the amount of things that would need to happen first is staggering.
M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4 All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18 ----------------------------------------------------- 2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD 2 Major breakups. 2 Rebounds
W 34 Me 42 Married 7 years together 8 0 kids 1 beloved dog BD 4/6/2018 I moved out 4/7/2018 I moved back in alone 8/05/2018 I file 3/06/2019 D official 5/7/2019
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
WW proposed we basically keep everything the same as we have been doing for schedule for S3. I mentioned to the Judge that i felt this was too much back and forth for S3 and I would like to see a more consistent schedule for him. The judge agreed with this. He said he will be reviewing our case and mailing us a temporary adjusted schedule. I like this because i know it will place S3 first and WW may have to make some schedule changes to accommodate it. She needs to actually adjust her life to be a parent, she is the one that needed a child so bad she lied about it and hid it from me, its time to take responsibility for the life she created.
We agreed that there are no assets or property to split, and barely anything was mentioned in regards to child support, which i imagine will be discussed next time we meet.
She also listed we should have joint decision making and that her house will be his "primary residence"
I'm OK with most of that, other than the Primary residence thing, and I am going to sugjest that we not even do child support, thereby lessening the burden on each other as well as the courts. We have an established history of Oct till now showing we can amicably split these costs without court interference, including daycare, medical, clothing food and diapers.
New hearing scheduled in Sept and there my be a pre trial hearing in-between then and now. SO it looks like ill still be married to her for the majority of the year. Lame.
In regards to emotions and whatnot. She was pretty quiet the whole time, didnt say much, only answered questions in very short "Yes" or "No"'s for the most part.
She did look really good, ill give her that, but her discomfort was somewhat palpable. She did try and do the "can i be in another room" thing but they said she needed to be in the courtroom, so she is still trying to avoid me.
I had very little noticable emotional response. If i am being honest i am FAR more concerned with my Dungeons and Dragons campaign than anything having to do with her lol.
I'm honestly shocked by this, after months of worrying about seeing her in person, and then it not happening. Now we got to the day i KNEW i would see her, and be in the same room, it didn't seem to phase me at all.
As i said, i made no eye contact, didn't speak to her directly at all and only gave a short "Hello" when FIL came over to hand off documentation to me.
Realistically not much happened, if anything. Once the judge sends a temp child schedule, things will be different, but it seems like this divorce is going to go very smoothly from here on out.
I just wish next hearing was closer in date and time, but who knows, that gives all summer to let things develop. Ill be curious how she acts over the next few months.
All i know is i have my GAL Mini Vacation coming up, S3 gets to go to my parents, which he is very excited about, and i have a great weekend planned. I havent seen S3's haircut yet, but he was in a rough mood yesterday when i dropped him off with MIL. They may not have even cut his hair if he was throwing a tantrum. Ill find out in a few hours when i pick him up.
I think i impressed the Judge, i had my stuff in order better than WW, and he kind of gave her a hairy eyeball for not presenting me with my documentation until this morning.
Ill update as needed, thanks to you all for your support!!
M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4 All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18 ----------------------------------------------------- 2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD 2 Major breakups. 2 Rebounds
"We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies."
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4 All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18 ----------------------------------------------------- 2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD 2 Major breakups. 2 Rebounds
I had very little noticable emotional response. If i am being honest i am FAR more concerned with my Dungeons and Dragons campaign than anything having to do with her lol.
I'm honestly shocked by this, after months of worrying about seeing her in person, and then it not happening. Now we got to the day i KNEW i would see her, and be in the same room, it didn't seem to phase me at all.
God works in very mysterious ways. Seeing her the other day at the intersection may have been what prepared you for today. He knows what you need better than you do. It always amazes me to look back at how He has worked in my life in the past, and how these kinds of coincidences tend to occur just when you need them.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
