Same game as before. She doesn't hear from you... She brings out the papers acting like she's made up her mind to file... You don't react the way she wants you to, so she then asks you if you are ready and wanting to take the next step... Putting it on you... Or wanting you to say it's not what you want... Can you see her pattern? She toys with you...
i mailed the paperwork yesterday so you should get it today or tomrw. please let me know when you do and when you send it back. I am very hurt you won't respond to me or allow me the opportunity to say things to you. hard to believe its gotten to that point for u and if it did, why it is on me to do the work and be the one to file when the thought of that is heartbreaking. if this is what you want as well then i want to know that to provide closure but it seems like you're not willing to say anything about how you feel.
M:30 W:28 T:9 MR:2.5 NoKids Seperation 1: 9/16-12/16 Move back in: 1/17 BD: 8/15 She moved out: 9/1
We will see. I can tell from the above text she is putting the "blame" of the D on me; as well as guilt-ing me. I do not want to have the same conversation I have had with her in the past (about how I do not want this). I find it incomprehensible that she really thinks I want a D. The only reason I can think she thinks I want a D, is b/c I have been dark/NC, and not meeting up with her.
In all honesty, if she does file, is it normal for the LBH not to hear out the WW? She says she wants to talk to me, i know this is some temp checking and trying to control the situation more; I am just curious.
M:30 W:28 T:9 MR:2.5 NoKids Seperation 1: 9/16-12/16 Move back in: 1/17 BD: 8/15 She moved out: 9/1
Of course she is putting the blame on you. God forbid she has to take responsibility for anything.
You've heard her out a bunch of times already. She feeds you the same BS, and yet, she changes nothing.
You are young. You share no kids. I believe in the commitment of marriage, but it would best serve you to get out. You have a chance to be with someone who believes in what a M truly is. You have a chance to have a family with someone who shares the same moral values as you.
Stop buying her manipulative BS. She's still acting like a kid and you should me married to a woman.
I'll add my 2 cents and agree with LH and Ginger here. You're still so young and no kids. There's so much going for you to find a new partner who can give you a much more fulfilling life, and kids if you both would want that.
Honestly, I wish I was in your position. I would've said sayonara months ago. I know this is hard and I don't mean to minimize your pain, but there are so many things going for you that allow you to basically recreate your life and start from scratch.
Just take it and run man! You're going to find that wonderful woman. Improve yourself and be the man that only a fool would leave. You have a long life ahead of you. Grab it by the ball$!
Chris - my W is doing something similar right now. Trying to guilt me into filing for D, even though I have repeatedly said that I do not want one. She thinks that it is my responsibility to do the dirty work for her and stomps her feet when I don't play along.
I am watching your sitch closely. Stay strong.
M: 50 W: 47 No kids together M: 10 T: 11 BD #1: 12/14 R #1: 7/15 BD #2: 1/18 D Filed: 6/18/18 D Final: 01/28/19 Currently still in-house
I'll also add, I was 27 when my exH left, 9 years together almost 4 married. Only difference was I had a 6 month old.
My daughter has saved my life. She was an IVF baby and I live and breathe for her. She is now 10, and I have ben raising her as a single woman since she was 6 months old.
And you know what? I wish to God my ex wasn't her father. I wish I had never ignored all the red flags, found my self respect and left him. Then maybe my daughter would have had a good father and intact family.
Now I am going to be 38 in 3 weeks. My daughter is beautiful, happy, and healthy, but I never remarried. Never got to have more children. My life has been dedicated to work and her. I don't have any help and dating is not easy for me.
You've got a chance for a full life here.
Really, who gives a crap who files. I don't understand why people make such a big deal out of it. It's who decided to destroy the M, not who actually filed for D who decided to get divorced.
