The Hits Keep on Coming

[Ginger1]

YOUR KIDS, JEEP! Whether or not she seemed all motherly and good with them, her unsteady volatile presence is not healthy for them at all. Kids hurt when someone pops in and out of their lives.

No one has a hold on you. You have control. It's your choice to exercise it.

Adulting and rational decisions s*ck.

Maybe you need a breather from all women and R's for a bit. It doesn't seem as if you have truly had one. You can certainly benefit from one.

[Cadet]

As for HQ, she suffers from severe PTSD brought on when her squad was ambushed while she was in Iraq (she is a combat medic) where 2 where KIA and several wounded.

Maybe you dodged another bullet.
Why are you attracted to women that have either manic or depressive issues?

What about someone with NO issues, that does not need to be fixed?

[Dawgs]

Hi Dawn!

Oh Jeep....I just want to give you a big hug! I feel bad now that I brought up HQ the other day in a comment I made to you. Sorry about that!

Having never dealt with someone with true mental issues like BPG has, I don't know that I can offer you any great advice, but I think what I can say, as several of us said on your other thread...RUN!!!!!!! You don't need or want that kind of drama and you certainly don't want that behavior modeled for your children.

Obviously I don't know you beyond the posts I read, but I think we all get these mental images of each other based on our postings and you strike me as a very strong, self-confident guy. Though we don't know each other in real life, I also have a very distinct mental picture of you physically and in my mind, you are a very attractive guy....remind me of someone I used to know in a weird way. I say all that to say that I have absolutely no doubt that there are plenty of attractive SANE women who would love to date you. So, don't stick with the one who clearly doesn't have her ducks in a row. You don't need that and your kids don't need it, no matter how young and hot she is. LOL

I know you know all that, by the way. I just don't really know what other advice to offer. Hang in there!

Thanks for the kind words. I try to keep myself in shape and healthy. Hard work, for sure.

Ever seen Deadpool? If so, know the story/relationship between Deadpool and Angel? That's how we fit, so to speak. Her crazy matched mine and etc.

Her issues didn't show for a long time. Sure, there were little things here and there, but nothing to warrant concern - that appeared much later.

But once again, its not about her age/hotness. Its the way we meshed. For some strange, inexplicable way we got each other and understood each other. Honestly, I'd take her out again given the chance. We shall see.

[Dawgs]

YOUR KIDS, JEEP! Whether or not she seemed all motherly and good with them, her unsteady volatile presence is not healthy for them at all. Kids hurt when someone pops in and out of their lives.

I get that, Ginger. They were upset when she left. However, my son heard us talking the other night and he said hi to her and they talked a little.

No one has a hold on you. You have control. It's your choice to exercise it.

True. I just can't explain it. She draws me in.

Maybe you need a breather from all women and R's for a bit. It doesn't seem as if you have truly had one. You can certainly benefit from one.

I agree. Total break

[Dawgs]

As for HQ, she suffers from severe PTSD brought on when her squad was ambushed while she was in Iraq (she is a combat medic) where 2 where KIA and several wounded.

Maybe you dodged another bullet.
Why are you attracted to women that have either manic or depressive issues?

What about someone with NO issues, that does not need to be fixed?

I don't know, Cadet. I just don't know. It's not like I go looking for issues/drama. It just happens to find me. I must have some big neon sign over my head that says "Crazy apply here."

[Dawgs]

I don't know why I attract those types. Just the luck of the draw, I guess.

Say, maybe its the strong-willed, don't take [censored] women - that aren't timid and meek? Let's look at this further and go by the last three of my relationships. I refuse to lump HQ in with the crazies as her issues are different - PTSD isn't the same [censored] as legit crazy, like crazy girl.

HQ - Soldier/warrior/athlete. Very strong physically and very large and in-charge type, definitely Type A personality. Doesn't take [censored] and will put you on your ass faster than you can think (loves to fight/wrestle, but I will spare those details). Will debate you until you give in. Also, very fun and highly energetic. Very loving and romantic. Has a softer side once the walls are down (not big walls, though). Highly sexual, but not a whore. Very loyal but not clinger. Suffers from PTSD. Very kind and caring, until you cross her - then look out.

The ex - Complete opposite of HQ. Quiet/timid/conflict avoidance type...until she puts her uniform on and then its a light switch. But ya'll know how messed up she was. No walls. Extreme pleaser type. Seeks attention like nobody's business (affair??). [censored] terrible childhood...I won't even try to talk that one down. Low key sexual (two positions - that's it), just a cheater. Don't even know if this one knows how to be loving, quite honestly. Her childhood [censored] ruined her. I'd say mid-level clinger

BPG. Athlete. Loves to fight in more ways than one. The Type A of the Type A's. Loud and in charge and in your face. Walls are a thousand miles high and thick - severe trust issues. Absolute zero mouth/brain filter and knows words I don't even lol. Also, very, very damaged - possibly as much, if not more, than the ex. I'd say borderline personality disorder, maybe even bipolar. Probably the most sexual woman I've ever met. Jumps from one to the other. A friend told me she'd always do that and never be satisfied. However, loves fiercely, madly, and deeply - also much stronger and sooner than I've ever experienced...I mean she loved hard. Burned bright, maybe too bright. Stage 5 clinger. Very fun.

Ok. Those are the last three major players. Apparently I attract crazy. What's yalls take on these?

[Dawn70]

I JUST had this conversation with my best friend the other day about why it is that seemingly awesome, truly good guys always attract and seem smitten with these women who are just bat sh!t crazy. Meanwhile, there are those of us in this world who are pretty normal (whatever "normal" is) and we have our crap together, know what we want, what we need and we get overlooked ALL the time. So, you seem to fall into that same category that he does of attracting or attaching to crazy and hanging on for dear life. Totally just my opinion, but I don't think I would put HQ in the same category. I think PTSD is a whole different ball of wax than just plain old f'ing crazy. But, then again, you point that out, so at least you realize it.

Following up what I said earlier about how I picture you, it makes sense that you choose those types of women. Those do tend to be the ones who stand up for themselves and speak their minds and wear the pants, so to speak. You don't want some shy little submissive chick, you want someone who will stand toe to toe with you and be your equal and crazy girls seem to do that, though in many cases, theirs is more of a false bravado and I would venture to guess that is where the crazy comes from. These are all just my own personal observations, of course, and I may very well be full of crap, so take it all with a grain of salt. I think you just haven't met the right woman yet....that one who can stand toe to toe with you, but comes across as not so in your face or too submissive. You need a strong, educated woman who knows when to be that fighter and put you in your place but also knows when to take a step back and let you lead, not because she is incapable of doing so, but because you are equals who share in that leading of your relationship....if that even makes sense. If it doesn't, drink a few beers and then maybe it will. LOL

[Dawn70]

Oh and yes I have seen Deadpool, so I get it. In fact, I know how it feels to have that kind of connection with someone because I have had it with someone for YEARS. And, it doesn't seem to matter what he does, it is ALWAYS there. He's not crazy, but he can be a typical man sometimes and unfortunately, sometimes "typical" men can be kinda jerky. (Not that women can't be jerky too, so I'm not trying to cause a debate here.)

[Dawgs]

I JUST had this conversation with my best friend the other day about why it is that seemingly awesome, truly good guys always attract and seem smitten with these women who are just bat sh!t crazy. Meanwhile, there are those of us in this world who are pretty normal (whatever "normal" is) and we have our crap together, know what we want, what we need and we get overlooked ALL the time. So, you seem to fall into that same category that he does of attracting or attaching to crazy and hanging on for dear life. Totally just my opinion, but I don't think I would put HQ in the same category. I think PTSD is a whole different ball of wax than just plain old f'ing crazy. But, then again, you point that out, so at least you realize it.

I don't know, either, Dawn. I really don't know how I attract these. HQ wasn't like BPG. In fact, I've never dated anyone like her. The thing about her is the way we mesh...just like in Deadpool - there is a connection unlike any I've ever seen outside HQ (experienced in person, that is). I don't know what will come of this one. Honestly, most likely nothing. Maybe that is the best thing.

But the question looms, given the chance, would I? Honestly, I'd have to say yes.

As you said, I need people who will stand toe to toe with me. Both HQ and BPG were like that. And both would put you on your backside in a hot second. The difference is HQ is grounded, so to speak. BPG will go off. But her crazy matches mine. I do not like submissive personality types (bedroom is a different story)...I like those that won't back down and aren't afraid to put me in my place.

What you said makes perfect sense. However, I still need more than a few beers. And still no contact from BPG.

I haven't heard from HQ in sometime now. I've said my goodbyes to her, sadly.

[DonH]

Why are you attracted to women that have either manic or depressive issues?

What about someone with NO issues, that does not need to be fixed?

Jeep74 Response: I don't know why I attract those types. Just the luck of the draw, I guess.

Them finding you actually could be just the luck of the draw - that is possible. However, you engaging, responding to and in many ways longing for an R with them is on you - it's YOUR CHOICE - no luck of any draw here. Perhaps the question really is, what is going on with you that the more broken the person, the more you want to be with them? What is broken in you that you want this - and not only want it, but can't seem to resit it or even stop yourself from going after it - even at personal cost and the potential damage to your kids? What's going on there?