You can build a good, even a great, life for yourself. And you will.
Not only that, you are going to be a kicka$$ daddy. Just the fact that you are worried about how you're going to do it, tells me how deep and steadfast your love is for your children. They are lucky to have you.
You are going to be just fine, and you'll look back on these days and see how awesome you really are. Hang in there.
M-60 H-51 M-14 years BD 12/26/16 S 1/1/17
"First the pain, then the rising." Glennon Doyle Melton
You can build a good, even a great, life for yourself. And you will.
Not only that, you are going to be a kicka$$ daddy. Just the fact that you are worried about how you're going to do it, tells me how deep and steadfast your love is for your children. They are lucky to have you.
You are going to be just fine, and you'll look back on these days and see how awesome you really are. Hang in there.
Thank you so much for your kind words. They really made my day better. I really want to make my kids proud of me. The path is just so foggy right now; so foggy that I'm battling on just giving up on my life and staying miserable
Originally Posted By: Btrow
Just dropping by to wish you good luck tomorrow LC.
How is she making your life h3ll on purpose though? All you write about is how nice she is to you. Would you like her to be mean?
And I second what Leah is writing, you will be just fine. It just takes some time to get there.
Thanks Btrow. Well, by wanting to go to mediation instead of negotiating everything together like she first said. I need to dig papers through, skip work, put my name on a paper that basically restricts me and makes her life easier...
Believe or not, I'd rather see my XW being angry at me than sending me pictures of my kids or sharing something. I wish she would just leave me alone but I don't want to say anything about it. It's odd how she just doesn't realize. If you are that far away from me, there is no reason to keep contacting me daily. Like zero, nada. It doesn't help me detach and get better if I'm constantly being reminded of how I'm only seeing 1/3rd of the life of my kids.
In my thirties, BDd 2017, divorced 2 young kids new relationship
"Dear XW. I miss my kids so much when they are not with me. When ever you send me pictures of them it hurts and brings me down. Could you please stop doing that, thanks. /LC"
If you truly don't care for her anymore, you are free to do and say whatever you want. Forget DB'ing. Just do what's best for you.
M:46 WXW:40 T:20 M:13 D3,D8,D10 BD:11/12/16 D:12/14/16 OM confirmed 01/20/17
Well I f*cked up my DBing already so might as well. Although I still think it's better to show strength, it will eventually stop anyways. OM would probably feel a bit off if she would still send me pictures of kids daily.
In my thirties, BDd 2017, divorced 2 young kids new relationship
I believe there is a difference in showing strenth towards your XW than being emotional regarding the kids.. But that's just my take on the subject.
If you want to show strenght, then why do you want to sit in different rooms tomorrow? A strong man goes into that room with nothing but confidence (if you are able to off course).
M:46 WXW:40 T:20 M:13 D3,D8,D10 BD:11/12/16 D:12/14/16 OM confirmed 01/20/17
True. It's not about confidence but to break the "women high-fiving and hating on men" atmosphere everyone keeps saying those things have. Also I'm not particularly keen in telling how much I earn now to my XW as it really isn't her business. I can't also give day specifics of when I can be with my kids as we agreed every second weekend plus ex-tempore (say @wknd) agreements for the next week or so. I bet she's going to want more stabile days which I just can't give, especially agree with a name on a paper because I don't know where she's gonna move, where I'm going to be working at and so on.
I just think it's better for her to realize herself than for me to say it because if in the future I need some less important info from her, it probably feels less natural to ask. I still want to keep the communication open but it just feels so odd for her to say she's drifted so far yet message me daily...? I'd assume one would understand what "drifting far away" means...
Also, maybe on some level I still want to DB. I know I f*cked it up already, but still.
In my thirties, BDd 2017, divorced 2 young kids new relationship
Well that's over now. The woman asked why the divorce and my XW cried hysterically. Relieved now. I heard so many horror stories about it beforehand but it wasn't that bad.
Next step is the D itself. Then it's over.
In my thirties, BDd 2017, divorced 2 young kids new relationship
