Dear darling Westo, this has pursuit written all over it and you now how that will end up. I recall Job's posts about how they sit and stare at the walls and never accomplish anything but feel like they are busy as time flies by. Sounds like your H.
He's going to come. Slowly, oh so maddeningly slowly, but he will come. Focus on you and D and family and let him do his thing.
Yes, I know what it looks like. But I know him and while I keep quiet, he will think all is fine and carry on with his lifestyle of going to the pub, playing pool etc.
Well I've had enough. I brought our anniversary up as I didn't want to bring up the real reason......mainly our GD who he hasn't seen either since our talk. I can't be the fixer here, so won't mention her.
She is asking where he is (remember she thought he was dead) and asking why he hasn't taken her out, as promised. Crying and saying she misses him. Also I think the stress is affecting D and me. She's angry that he hasn't fulfilled his promise.
We had an almighty row last week. This limbo of the last few weeks is actually worse than the NC before my diagnosis! Coly mentioned that H sounds like a slow mover and he really is.
There is a very known saying here in Wales: I'll do it in a minute now.
That is H to a tee. So I'd like to think I'm just giving him a gentle nudge. After all.....it's not going to make the blindest difference at the end of the day.
We will either reconcile or not, but enough is enough. He knows that I won't shut up now. As far as I'm concerned he's known he wants reconciliation for nearly three months.
It's now a case of......come in number nine, your time is up.
Westo - He's perhaps comfortable because you are right where he left you.
Perhaps you need an adventure. Not the bodice ripping sort nor train robbery but maybe a couple of days by the sea-side or something.
Let him wonder where you are and what you're up to and have some fun in the mean-time.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Hi Westo, I understand that you want to know but I encourage you to follow the wise advice from others.
Step back, leave him be and make some nice plans for yourself. I don't think pushing and prodding is a good plan, sometimes doing nothing helps much more.
Take care and enjoy the long weekend xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
Hey Westo, all of this is so hard isn't it especially when you do not know what is going on in his head. Maybe all the nights he has been doing has prevented him from taking the next step?
I know you have been at this for a while so you must be exhausted and now you have had a hint that he wants to come back he annoyingly takes several steps back! I really don't envy the position you are in now. Almost dipping your toe in the river of piecing. However let him show you with his actions that he really does want to reconcile otherwise if you do all the work you will always be wondering....
Big cwtch to you (((Westo))), hang in there...
Me - 47 H - 45 D-16 M - 6 years Separated - May 16
Don't leave me behind can't you see me I'm shining... (Years & Years - 'Shine')
Hi guys, I understand your concerns, I really do. I would be exactly the same if I was on the outside reading.
But....I know this man and I always listen to my inner voice. I trust it. When we ended our last call...she said "we are going to be ok".
He texted me Saturday morning at 2am 'hope you are feeling ok and asleep at this time'. It did make me laugh. I suppose this is his way of communicating like I asked him to do. The text also opened the possibility of me saying 'yes, have you sorted stuff yet?' Which is not like him and I didn't do.
So he texted again yesterday saying that he was away this weekend organising a motor sport event. He does every year. So we texted back and forth. Today is our anniversary and he texted to ask what I was up to on our Anniversary day.
I wanted to answer that I was throwing a party for 50 people, was drunk and doing the fandango, but just told him I was watching the cycling on the telly. 🙄
A few texts later I asked if he'd managed to sort things. His reply? ' not quite, but I will. I've had a few issues which I'll tell you about again'.
I just answered ok.....he knows I won't leave this go. Believe me I would get the silent treatment if he absolutely wasn't ready.
We shall see, he knows if the issues were about OW I don't want to know!
Westo - I know that we've chatted about this before a loooong time ago.
I know that there aren't a lot of counseling resources available to you and you do the whole British "stiff upper lip" thing despite being probably closer to the Irish than the Britons
No matter what direction your separate paths turn you may want to consider your support network. Perhaps the next time you are in the hospital for your treatments ask there what resources are available for mental and moral support.
You are an amazing and resilient woman. But you may want to know where you can reach out for help when you need it.
((cwtch) right back at you.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
