I'm going to reference back to the comments on the last pages of the previous thread. I'm talking about the whole introducing children - especially those pre-teen - to those we are dating. Don't ask me why as I have no bio-kids, although I'm still close with my now adult stepson and daughter 10+ years post divorce, I've also been told over and over I was a great SD. Anyhow, my point is, I feel so strongly about this and always made sure not to cross those lines myself - even if the person I was dating didn't see a problem.
Young kids are so effected by divorce - they just are. Hell even adult children talk about how much it effects them to have their parents D even if they are adults themselves. Then someone else comes into their life and they get attached only for that person to go away. This writes on the slate of who they are. It really effects them. I don't think anyone wants that to happen - it's not intentional but does it matter if it's intended or not? It really effects them. I think that's why the "experts" suggest not allowing it until you are positive things are staying together - not you think they will because we all THINK they will early on. They have no control over it and if there is a break up they go through grief. Kids also have this ability to blame themselves. They take blame for the initial D so then take blame for the break up.
Is it difficult? You bet. Is it sometimes really difficult? Yes it is. But many things that are the right thing to do are very difficult. So Jeep I really applaud you in this. It's the right thing to do.
Then on aside... we are on a board where D has ripped most of our lives apart - so as soon as a new R starts, we encourage marriage even bet (allabiet in jest and fun) when the marriage will happen? Really? I don't get it.
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
Thanks for stopping in. Love the name, BTW. Am from and now live in this great state again. And went to a certain university that carries the same name (bleed red and black, ma'am). I've read your thread and love your insightfulness!
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
Thanks for stopping in. Love the name, BTW. Am from and now live in this great state again. And went to a certain university that carries the same name (bleed red and black, ma'am). I've read your thread and love your insightfulness!
Here I thought I liked you and now I see that you are a "dawg". LOL Hmmmmmm......I guess I can't hold that against you, as you are an alum. As an alum of another famous SEC school, I bleed Razorback red. Woo pig sooie!
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
(Swooooooooooon)You are a Dawg? How did I miss this? Me loves my alma mater (I'm one of THOSE people who has decor on my car and in my yard)and my guy lives in said town now. Fantastic dining establishments there:)
Part 2 of all I have to offer. Thanks for the kind words. Always appreciated.
3 kids BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. ) Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style D final 9-9-14 "Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
I, too, have a very deep concerns about bringing new people around my children. My ex, however, doesn't seem to care that much because they were in and out of their lives growing up so much that it was like a revolving door...but that's another issue I have with them.
I agree on it affecting them and that's why I shy away from doing it. It's just not going to happen on my watch. Some may feel differently. Another thing, is mine still believe in their mom and that she's coming back to the family when she retires and moves back. Ugh.
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Is it difficult? You bet. Is it sometimes really difficult? Yes it is. But many things that are the right thing to do are very difficult. So Jeep I really applaud you in this. It's the right thing to do.
Thank you, kind sir, for the words. Its not easy by any means.
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Then on aside... we are on a board where D has ripped most of our lives apart - so as soon as a new R starts, we encourage marriage even bet (allabiet in jest and fun) when the marriage will happen? Really? I don't get it
You'll find that talk in fun and jest is a way to blow steam and make this hell a little less bearable. Its a release. In reality, none of us would ever consider remarrying at this stage - I most certainly won't. But, I will joke about it and bring some levity to these dark times.
However, I do encourage getting back on that horse...even if it is just coffee or dinner or whatever. Works wonders for the soul. Take my oft-talked about Harley Q for example. In all honesty, would I like to get back to where we were back then? Not sure you are aware of our history, but its deep. I can say that if that opportunity presents itself, I may just take it...however, before I can fully travel that - or any - road to that depth I have to clear some things inside me first.
But no matter what happens, I won't bring anyone around them for a long, long time.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
Here I thought I liked you and now I see that you are a "dawg". LOL Hmmmmmm......I guess I can't hold that against you, as you are an alum. As an alum of another famous SEC school, I bleed Razorback red. Woo pig sooie!
I can let that go. As long as you don't have a puke orange color, we are all good. Haha
Yes, I am very much a Dawg!
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
(Swooooooooooon)You are a Dawg? How did I miss this? Me loves my alma mater (I'm one of THOSE people who has decor on my car and in my yard)and my guy lives in said town now. Fantastic dining establishments there:)
Oh I most certainly am. I'm one of those also...and am absolutely loving what CKS is doing there. Tell me, are you on any of the UGA forums? I love Athens, ma'am. There used to be this BBQ place there that I have to find that rivals it... Haven't been back in quite some time although we plan on going this coming season - will be my son's first game.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
Here I thought I liked you and now I see that you are a "dawg". LOL Hmmmmmm......I guess I can't hold that against you, as you are an alum. As an alum of another famous SEC school, I bleed Razorback red. Woo pig sooie!
I can let that go. As long as you don't have a puke orange color, we are all good. Haha
Yes, I am very much a Dawg!
Good Lord, NOOOOO on the orange. LOL All Razorback red, through and through. Both of my degrees are from there and I couldn't be prouder. Like you and GB with your dawg memorabilia, I am decked out in my office and my home in Razorback finery.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
Good Lord, NOOOOO on the orange. LOL All Razorback red, through and through. Both of my degrees are from there and I couldn't be prouder. Like you and GB with your dawg memorabilia, I am decked out in my office and my home in Razorback finery.
I knew that you were OK. I don't even know when we play ya'll again...but it would be a safe bet that red and black would come out on top.
I have stuff all over my place, too. My son wants to play for UGA and so does my daughter... hahaha
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
