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Right now you aren't ready to enter into a new relationship. Right now is your time to just be for a while. Sort through your feelings or not dwell on them at all. You don't have to worry about the future now. Right now, you really just have to take some time to be still.

Being still is the hardest thing to do sometimes. We all want forward motion (which we can still have by being still) and we want the answers to the future. You simply don't have them right now, and that is ok.

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Thank you, Ginger. I needed to hear that. You're right, I'm not ready and I'm not quite sure when that line will be crossed. But I do worry about the future, well, where my kids are concerned. But, I guess that's a different kettle of fish.

Take Harley for example. I really do want to see her, and not for a booty call (there may or may not be one of those around), but to genuinely see her. I mean, we had a great time and it has been quite a while since I've really enjoyed myself on a date or whatever it was called. I have a great time seeing/talking with others, but when I have time to decompress and think about things, that ghost tends to stick her head out of the shadows just enough to be seen.


There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
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You should always think of the future of your kids. But your future with your kids should be envisioned without another person. Some day when you are ready, someone will come along and fit into that.

But now, focus on your kiddos and the future you are building with them.

As far as Harley, it's a complicated situation.

If your ex said she wanted to get intense therapy for her issues today and then work on the M, what would you say?

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Quote:
You should always think of the future of your kids. But your future with your kids should be envisioned without another person. Some day when you are ready, someone will come along and fit into that.


I totally agree. I'm not quite sure when or even if I'll ever bring someone around them, and if I do it will be way into the future. Maybe someday someone will.

My kids are my life, totally. They are my rock, too. I can't imagine life without them. Ever.

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As far as Harley, it's a complicated situation.


I think that's the understatement of the year...haha


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If your ex said she wanted to get intense therapy for her issues today and then work on the M, what would you say?


Therein lies the rub. Honestly, I don't know. I've said before that the only way I'd take her back is if she were to do that. So, on that note, I probably would give it a go again. There are a lot of things that need to be done, though.

She really wasn't a bad person. We got along great and she was my best friend. And she is/was one of the most caring people that I have ever met. A good person, or so I thought.

However, she has let me know that all she wants is to be apart. Maybe one day it will happen, but I'm not putting my eggs in one basket.


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Also, Ginger, there is an inherent sadness about the whole thing that I just can't shake.

Had I been told everything early into our marriage I can say that maybe things would have been much different today. But on the flip side, maybe this marriage was destined to fail from the start. I guess that will be one of the great what-if's. Maybe she is to damaged to have any sort of commitment that marriage entails. I guess I'll never know.

I now see all that flags back then that I just attributed to her own tendencies, you know? I guess there is a reason they say hind sight is 20/20.

Her ghost lingers, especially at night.


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Originally Posted By: Jeep74
Had I been told everything early into our marriage I can say that maybe things would have been much different today. But on the flip side, maybe this marriage was destined to fail from the start. I guess that will be one of the great what-if's. Maybe she is to damaged to have any sort of commitment that marriage entails. I guess I'll never know.


Jeep,

Our situations are somewhat similar, however, my wife had a lot of repressed memories. In addition, I don't think she was totally honest about some of the things that she did tell me about. I have come to the conclusion that she's so broken, and so reluctant to get the kind of help she needs, that it would never be possible to reconcile with her.

Regarding Harley Quinn, I'm going to have to buy the Suicide Squad DVD. I don't think I can live without her. grin

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How's it hanging, doodler?

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Our situations are somewhat similar, however, my wife had a lot of repressed memories. In addition, I don't think she was totally honest about some of the things that she did tell me about. I have come to the conclusion that she's so broken, and so reluctant to get the kind of help she needs, that it would never be possible to reconcile with her.


There is plenty of room for you in my boat, brother. Seems just like mine.

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Regarding Harley Quinn, I'm going to have to buy the Suicide Squad DVD. I don't think I can live without her.


I have that movie, sir. My son likes it for different reasons - I brought it for him Margot makes an excellent Harley Quinn. However, you should see Harley in her Harley Quinn outfit. OMG is all I'm going to say. Did you ever look up those adult costumes?


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for him Margot makes


It should read "...for him. Margot"

Dang my proofreading has gone to the dogs lately.


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Originally Posted By: Jeep74
However, you should see Harley in her Harley Quinn outfit. OMG is all I'm going to say.


I'm jealous! Even better than Margot?


Originally Posted By: Jeep74
Did you ever look up those adult costumes?


No, I never did look up the adult Harley Quinn costumes; I didn't think I could handle it.

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Quote:
Even better than Margot?


No, man. Margot is out there. But this Harley is quite the looker.

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I didn't think I could handle it.


Haha. I'm dying. I wish we could post different emoji's than what we are limited to here. Heck, I'd post a pic of Harley (safe, of course) if I could. You'd be proud.


There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
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