***I didn't ask for a response nor did I sit around to wait for one. And I have to say that this felt good for me. It's certainly not the tough love approach that some of you are advocating and I respect that. But I think this works better for me right now.***
I think we all here need to read the book and take the advice with an open mind...but then apply what we think is best for our situation, for ourselves...
***And here's the most peculiar thing...for the very first time I started thinking about how I might NOT want to try to save my marriage. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE the way my W used to be. But it was clear through our interaction tonight that she's really changed, and not for the better. The selfishness that she disguises as her "new wide-awake self" is starting to show its true colors. She talks a good game, but I'm really starting to see that she's not thinking clearly. I also think that she drinks too much...This gave me some clarity and might possibly have been a moment when I detached a bit further.***
Wow, I haven't gotten here yet; maybe that's why I'm having detachment issues. Trying to get to the following place myself:
***Her unhealthy mental state and her traumatic childhood thrives on drama and conflict and I don't think she can ever be in a healthy relationship until she resolves these problems. For the longest time I thought that I would be able to help her with this, but I'm starting to realize that I can't. This is her road to travel and the best I can do is stand on the sidelines and cheer for her...Thinking about my sitch in this way brings me a sense of peace that I haven't felt in quite a while.***
Chris73--thanks for sharing.
Last edited by Cadet; 01/10/1709:54 AM. Reason: Start a new thread message
Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids 2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong 2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2 2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving
