I take a short cut on my daily walk past a very nosy neighbour who I've known for years. I last saw her at the end of the summer after shed heard H had left.
Cue Welsh accent...her "awwww, I heard H had gone, how are you girl?" (Looking at me like someone had died). "I can't believe it, I mean it's not like you go out all the time picking up men.....mind you, I'll not hear a bad word against him"
Me "I don't have a bad word against him".
Since then I've dreaded going past her place incase of questions and that bloody sympathetic look. Anyway I bumped into another neighbour (we're all similar ages) a couple of weeks later, we are Facebook friends too (not the other one, she's not onFB) and we talked about getting a tattoo. She did and sent me pics on messenger. She knew I had a consultation Tuesday morning.
Anyway, I haven't seen nosy neighbour since then but still dread going past her place. I took a walk after my consultation and just as I got to her house hear her voice........oh God, I nearly turned back to take the long way round but I was dying for a pee, so gritted my teeth.
Can you believe it.....she was talking to tattoo friend. When I approached she looked at me and said "awwwww happy new year, how are you girl?" (You can guess the look).
I love my walk and felt so good. "Great thanks" with a big grin (she looked gutted). Then tattoo friend said "well, did you get it done?".
I told them I was having it done next week. Nosy one didn't know anything about us getting tattoos and her face was a picture.
If that wasn't a sign that I'm doing the right thing, I don't know what is!
Another thing....both are very overweight, tattoo friend is hobbling after knee surgery and as the other turned and limped up her garden holding her back I thought....look at me, walking six miles a day with my Nordic poles.
Westo - you are indeed. In my own journey one of the things that I did that helped me a huge amount was to "reclaim" spaces. Places that had fond memories and places where my STBX would carry on her affair. This is my home and community and by facing those places and people I grew stronger and less afraid.
I'm looking forward to hearing how the tattoo turns out.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
D text him last night about the fact he forgot her birthday. It had bugged her that he texted S to ask if he was going to SS 30th surprise birthday party.
I told her that if his mum hadn't have told him about this party I doubt he would have remembered his either.
S said he wasn't going as he was working. H answered that he too was working. Odd....why bother asking!
He apologised to D and said that he had forgotten his own birthday last May.
Lie!!!! He had promised to come home that day, but I received an email at the time he was supposed to arrive saying "it's my BDay today and I didn't want a fuss" blah blah blah.
GD was watching videos of her and him on FB and started crying again saying her Papa had gone and she misses him.
If I were in your shoes, I would remain still and quiet. He knows where you are and when he's ready, he'll contact you. They can go days, week and months before contacting you...but I can assure you, if he wants something, he will definitely contact you.
Continue as you have been and keep the focus on you.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I'm sorry H forgot your D's birthday. Isn't it strange how they forget important things like thst. They are so wrapped up in themselves nothing or no one else matters!
I love reading your posts. Reminds me of my ex-parent in laws (D's grandparents) who are Welsh although MIL sadly passed away when D was small. She often used to give D a lovely big cwtch!
Me - 47 H - 45 D-16 M - 6 years Separated - May 16
Don't leave me behind can't you see me I'm shining... (Years & Years - 'Shine')
