Well, tonight is the first night I am sleeping in the apartment. Soon many boxes to open still. Have lots to do this weekend as the boys are coming back Sunday evening.
Today's events:
Moved almost all our things out of the house. Neighbor helped and is storing a few of the last boxes in his garage, have to put them in storage tomorrow.
Thought I only needed two storage units but no, we have so many things I had to rent a 3rd one.
Internet cable and TV being set up in the morning and cleaning lady coming to help also. Have acupuncture at 130 to continue to kick the smoking habit. Then going to get the last of my stuff from my neighbor. He helped me move things tonight and we went and had a drink to relax. Cried a few times today much less than yesterday. Even the buyers of the house helped pack some things for me. It was bittersweet but I feel ok and that I will survive.
I hope everyone gets a good night's rest.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
Woke up this morning tired. Slept well but slept in the couch since I have been moving things for the past 3 days. I have one last batch to move into storage. We have so many things I could furnish 2 houses
So storage sizes are as follows: 1 10 x 20 and 2 10 x 15 units. Yikes!
TV and cable are hooked up. Started to open boxes and put things away but now have to reorganize boxes because I did not plan correctly to have minimum stuff that I should have brought to the apartment. STBX would definitely scold me for that.
My mind is still all over the place. I need to stay strong and fight for the boys. Have a lot to still tell the psychologist.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
JimK Stay strong as you are in the home stretch. Moving is a bear even without the situation you are in!
Slowly it will come together. Glad you are moving on......
_________________________ Me-48 Spouse-WAW 52 Married for 10 years D7 ILYBNILWY 7/15 Suspect EA/PA 12/15 No confirmation/denial She files 1/2016 Working towards the Big D ...still in progress....
So STBX sends me a text asking how closing went and how getting set up in the apartment is going. Also says she is going to drop off boys around 2 or 3.
Not sure how to respond other than no issues with closing and move is going well.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
You are doing it the right way. You will prevail on the other side. Your sons are lucky to have you and they will forever honor and respect the struggle that you are going through.
Keep your head up high, continue to learn, evolve and be the man that a fool is leaving.
Me 46 Former W 46 D19 D7 BD Feb 2016 WAW moves out 4/16/16 D final 6/1/2017
It's time for me to start changin' the way I look at the world......and at myself. ~James Howlett aka Wolverine
Got a good night's rest. I woke up with anxiety knowing that STBX is coming today.
I don't understand why I get these thoughts in my head like I am inferior to her? She doesn't want to discuss anything. I know things would be different if she did not have MIL and FIL enabling this. They make me out to be this horrible person and that I am hurting the boys. I am sure they make me sound like the child who just can't let go of the M and accept the D and move to Toronto.
Well if I did move it would't be because of STBX's family wanting me to do this it would be because I made the decision to go for my boys and I would do this after the D is final. I am going through this h3ll to hopefully teach them a lesson that STBX needs to be an adult and stand on her own. Is she lucky to have a parachute from her parents, yes.
Well I don't have that and need to do everything in my power to protect my boys and me.
The apartment still has wall to wall boxes in it. I hate being alone and not loved by my STBX. She can't put on the brakes and realize what she is doing to the boys. Have to muster up the strength to get through this day.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
I know the feeling about the in laws. I went through much the same in my sitch, and realized that I was wasting so much energy on worrying about what they thought, and what they were saying about me. I can't tell you how exactly I was able to disconnect from that anxiety, but I know it came shortly after I realized it was bugging me so.
It was at my D's graduation when I knew I no longer cared what they thought or how they enabled my WAW.
You to will get to that point. Just recognize and know they have no power over you and their behavior says more about them than it does about you.
Focus on the box you are unpacking and that will take your mind off of things for a moment.
Be well today.
Me 46 Former W 46 D19 D7 BD Feb 2016 WAW moves out 4/16/16 D final 6/1/2017
It's time for me to start changin' the way I look at the world......and at myself. ~James Howlett aka Wolverine
Those feelings of being inferior are normal ......I find myself jumping still when she says I don't do this or that...and find I start doing it when she is away (like laundry) but then snap out of it
Your the strong one, not her and don't forget that......don't do what you think she will want you to do, do what you feel is right and keep unpacking!
_________________________ Me-48 Spouse-WAW 52 Married for 10 years D7 ILYBNILWY 7/15 Suspect EA/PA 12/15 No confirmation/denial She files 1/2016 Working towards the Big D ...still in progress....
