Sorry to hear about the delay. Getting more closure is good for you so hope that speeds up
Time to process things? Seems the STBX's are full of excuses.....mine usually says she is so busy she couldn't get x, y z done...but has no real job.
Hang in there...
_________________________ Me-48 Spouse-WAW 52 Married for 10 years D7 ILYBNILWY 7/15 Suspect EA/PA 12/15 No confirmation/denial She files 1/2016 Working towards the Big D ...still in progress....
Just closed on the apartment and have the keys. It's small but I feel good. Right outside the door wall is a play area for the boys. I am sure they will be excited about that I know I am.
Still praying everything is in my favor in the end. Judge was right 4 walls don't make a home so we will have fun with what we have!
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
Yes, feel stronger, kind of sad tonight as the marital home is being packed up by movers and going to move stuff to apartment tomorrow and remaining items into storage on Friday and then sign on the dotted line for the sale of the marital home. Oh well!
Contacted STBX to confirm logistics of the boys over then next week and gave her an update on booking daycare for the little ones. Asked her if she had everything she needed for the boys this weekend and she said yes. She huffed and puffed and was not in good spirits.
I asked if everything was ok, she said no and started to blame me on how we will have to go through all the boxes to separate assets and why couldn't we have done this before. I validated by saying I understand and can feel you are frustrated with this process. Stated again for IDK the 100th time that this is not what I prefer either.
She has no patience for my validation any longer, the volcano erupted again and she said I didn't do the work and that she no longer wants to be with me and continued to blame me. I just let her talk for a bit. I said "just so I understand you correctly you wanted a separation where we are both allowed to date? I will not be in a relationship with you and other OMs." More spew from W, I don't want you anymore can't you understand that? Yes, I understand that is why I am letting you go. You can go and have all the Rs you want but I am going to protect my boys.
I think I did a better job validating as I did have a DB coaching session today. The coach asked me to be W and talk about how W feels about me. It was a good exercise and I have my notes to review.
All in all an average day with a couple of small 180s and wins and no losses. Can't beat that!
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
STBX has no plan and no job (well in STBX's mind her job is SAHM) so I guess she will be busy while I handle solving the world's problems.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
Well still have lots of things at the house and we have to close at 3pm. Today is going to be difficult.
When I woke up this morning I had thoughts in my head about giving up and letting STBX have everything but then that just makes me another enabler to her entightlement.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
Some things are worth fighting for. Your kids and your marriage certainly are worth it. Be proud of standing tall in the face of the storm. People around you are noticing even if they don't say anything.
Me:49 W:45 M:19 T:22 EA confirmed and ended 8/2014 S:19,17 D:9,5
You are going to make it, Jim. Once the proceedings are over and you've had time to adjust, I think you will do as some other LBH'S and start to enjoy your time to do as you really want, instead of doing what she wanted. It seems you may have lived that way during your M, and now you will have free time to spend as you want.
Take a look at Si-07's past few posts and you will see how he is discovering there are some benefits to living single.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
I do see the light at the end of the tunnel. I will have to reset myself and set goals once everything is over.
STBX of course changed plans for the day again. She already signed the closing documents and is leaving me to do the walk through on the house and go to closing. Typical Jim has to do it all. I just shake my head and sigh.
Thank you again for being so supportive.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
