Don't Look Back

[rd500]

A big storm came through Sunday morning !!!!!!!!!! And people call me cheeky. !!!!!!

[SunnyB]

Oh, RD. You always make me laugh. . Hope you are doing well.

[rd500]

Hi Sunny. Sounds like life is good for you again and I'm very pleased for you

Maybe others didn't pick up on your coded message re Sunday morning but it was hard to ignore !!!!!!!!!!!

Really happy that you have happiness back in your life and I was never in doubt you would make it. You deserve it all and while I'm very envious of Mr Chemistry I know in my heart it would only have been a sexual thing had we meet !!!!!!

Take care and here's to many of those Sunday mornings , Rd xx

[Vanilla]

Three of my go to about parenting on one thread!

Sunny, Maybe LL and RD

Would you be so kind as to check in on this newcomer for me, I can support although I feel as parents you can be more effective.

five kids one on the way and distress of children

Thank you in advance

[Vanilla]

Sorry the V was missing and the hugs

V

[SunnyB]

V, I checked in on Six, but I haven't checked in on you in a long time. Hope you are hanging in there, my friend.

[Zues126]

Well Sunny, I guess this is the beginning of the inevitable. You know, how the check ins get a little less frequent, they go from days to weeks, then eventually months. Then life marches on and we're not all posting on DB anymore.

I won't fight that. I've learned that's life. But I do want to take this opportunity to tell you how much I have appreciated you on these forums. When I get a little too carried away you kind of laugh about it and it makes it easy to deescalate. You almost never spoke a bad work against Mr. X. You are easy going, yet you are fiery and passionate as well. Really special Sunny. Thanks for sharing some of the worst parts of my life with me and helping me along.

That all said, I don't want you to go anywhere just yet either. Keep checking in!

[SunnyB]

Zues, I'm not going anywhere, I'll still check in. I just don't have a lot to say. I might sign D papers as soon as this week. Mr. P and I continue to get along pretty well, co-parent very well, and there are actually days that I don't think about him at all. I go out with friends, I date, but there's no one special. My point is, I'm one of a million divorced women my age, and I just don't know what I can contribute to the boards. I didn't save my M. Yes, I'm happy, but I'm not the story of hope that people come here looking for.

Still, I appreciate you checking in on me and hope you will continue to do so, along with some other people, RD, V, Maybell, Claire, Raliced, Stacey, Betsey, and others I don't see around anymore. You guys feel like family.

[SunnyB]

OK, because Zues asked me to keep checking in, and because K-Girl is still here......

There is pretty much nothing to report this week. LOL In legal stuff, our Ls had a phone call earlier this week to hammer out some minuscule detail on the agreement, which I will read and sign this upcoming week. It's been over for so long that this is anti-climactic.

In the dating side of things, I have no lack of dates. What I have is lack of discernment about what I really want to do. There's one guy that's standing out from the rest, I'd really love to be seriously involved with him, but there are complicating factors. Him being the primary caregiver to his 4 kids is one of them, the youngest is only 9. I find myself knowing what I want from a relationship, and observing that he might not be able to give it to me. What trumps, head or heart? I went with head last time. It's a real learning process for me.

Life other than that is good, work goes on, I take care of my kids, I go out with friends. Tonight I'm having a birthday dinner for Mr. P at my house, yes, I'll bake his favorite cake and buy the right brand of ice cream. And I'll smile when he leaves.

[KGirl]

I find myself knowing what I want from a relationship, and observing that he might not be able to give it to me.

Ahh, yes. I think I stayed in this recent relationship a little too long because there were a lot of things I was excited about, despite the fact that I saw a number of warnings that he was not going to be able to give me what I want. I guess I thought that maybe if everything else was good the other pieces wouldn't matter so much. It seems they were non-negotiable, though.

I guess you have to determine - are you willing to go with the flow and see what develops (even though it may affirm what you were thinking originally)? Or be firm in your boundaries? No right answer, I suppose. I went on a few dates with people being firm about what I wanted, but something about this last guy swayed me... whether it was a good thing or bad thing has yet to be determined, I guess. It may make me more firm about sticking with the things I already determined I value/want in a relationship and not compromising them.

Are you to a point where you can have a conversation about it yet? Where you can say "Here is what I am looking for in a relationship... what are you looking for? Do you think these things are compatible?" Maybe he will be upfront and say "no" and that would probably make it easier.