LBH w/ a WW trying to save my M (4)

[gs9]

WW is trying to cake eat again. She called my for help with our computer yesterday. I answered her questions briefly and got off the phone.
When I arrived home I kissed D4 and high-fived WW and told her "good job" because she landed a new job yesterday. I then headed back out to my truck to get some additional items. She quickly asked with a concerned voice " are you leaving?" I told her I wasn't and just getting things from the truck.
Back in the house I was standing behind the couch she was sitting on. I looked down and she was texting the man she slept with 5 months ago.
Soooooo irritated! But just a great reminder of the massive amount of disrespect she has shown me for most of our M. I didn't show her any of this anger. I just went and took a shower then to bed to watch tv. D4 came upstairs to join me. Not much later WW came in and put D4 PJ's on, brushed her teeth and asked D4 if she wanted to sleep with Mommy. D4 said "I want to sleep with Daddy."
WW came through later quietly to get ready for bed. We had the lights out. She quietly told me good night.

She's being nice but still trying to cake eat. Only 6 weeks left to final hearing. Have to keep reminding myself I need to do what's right for D4 and me. God's got this. He doesn't need my help or additional time.

She's told others that there's not as much to these men as I think there is but what she is showing me is that she must think even less of me.

[gs9]

Journaling
I'm finding myself thinking about her less and less.....and it doesn't make me sad.
She has continually chose these other men over me consistently for 5+ months.
Her fantasy world of us divorcing and then getting back together is not reality.
I'm very willing to help her through this storm of her self healing but not while she carries on her A's. If she would dump them and commit to respecting our M I would help her weather this storm. Not even commit to working on the M until she is completely healed but just to commit to respecting the M. Because she won't I'm ready for the D. I don't want it but I won't be treated like this either. I'll fight like a dog until the D is signed. After.........I'm moving on and not looking back.

[gs9]

Journaling
feeling pretty good today. Yesterday I went to the gym after work and then straight to pick up a friend to go and watch football. NC with WW since Wednesday evening and that was very minimal.
She still isn't fighting about the MBR. I was home by 10pm and everyone was in bed. S14/S12 were over last night. They slept in their room with D4. WW slept in D4's room. About 3am D4 came and climbed in bed with me. No one up when I left for work.

[gs9]

Question

WW just sent this text
"I'm trying to open a file sent to me today in our email, it's not in my downloads. Can you figure out a way to send it to me? Thank you"

My initial response is to tell her to bugger off. My second thought is to ignore it. My third thought it is to respond in a bit telling her I'm not in the office.

Thoughts?

[otw]

she is temp checking you. I would either let it sit for a while or tell her you are unable to do it right now but you could possibly try later. Or like you said out of the ofice.

she is def seeing if you will do it or not.

[gs9]

thanks OTW. It's often difficult to see through the fog.

[otw]

I can tell you from my experience I used to jump at the chance to help her with anything. Didnt get me anywhere, usually not even a thank you. Made me feel temp good for helping her but i think i was giving myself false hope somehow.

I know we are supposed to be good people and help whenever we can, but we are also not supposed to be taken advantage of either when it is convenient for the other person.

just my opinion right now.

[Sotto]

I'm not a vet, but I'd be inclined to ignore it. She fired you as her spouse and has initiated D proceedings. Are you going to continue offering a technical support service to her if the D goes through?

[gs9]

No I will not. Not being in the office wasn't entirely a lie. I was here for a bit but it wasn't convenient for me to stop what I was doing to help her. I just returned to the office and sent her the attachment she was looking for. Based on her emails to her boss it looks like she figured it out on her own.

Her new job is sending out a hiring announcement. the email from her boss said " Is there anything in particular you would like for the team to know about you (children, spouse, etc.)?

she replied "I have 3 children, S 14, S 12, and D 4. My husbands name is XXXXX. I'm an avid Denver Bronco fan"

I'm not reading into it. Nothing to hang a hat on. It's just been awhile since I've been referred to as her H. I know it doesn't mean anything.

[gs9]

Its tough to not be loving but not to be unloving.....to not be friendly but not unfriendly.