I am so sorry to hear that. I know the feeling very well. I unfortunately don't have your will power (Lord knows I need it). In my snooping I have found out who they are (one I have met before at one of her work events), the other I don't know, but do know she is flirting with them. That information has only made my negative intrusive thoughts stronger. I am now working on getting that will power.
Sometimes you need the D in order to move forward or move on. I know you feel a certain way right now, because knowing that information doesn't help at all. Continue to pray my friend, continue to work on detaching, God will not put something in your path that you cannot overcome. Drop the rope if you need to, that might be what you both needed. Just continue to focus on you my friend. ILYNOT 2.5 is a much better version of you.
Here to support you.
M: 34 W: 33 S: 7 S: 14 months BD: 6/2015 Separation: 6/2015 Back and Forth between Home and Moms
Even though the wound has opened up again, I feel it is absolutely necessary to have that dang paper signed in order for me to move forward, I feel like the rope is still attached to my neck as I try and pull away and pull away, it keeps bringing me back, it hurts.
I had to ask for her to finally file and move on.
I cant do this any longer, seems shes getting further ahead with OMs while Im the friend she calls when her car breask down, or needs something, not anymore..
You control the rope, not her. You are the one who has to turn lose and let it drop to the ground.
Do you see, now, why I tell men they cannot be the WW's BFF?
ILY - I understand that you want to drop the rope. Why do you think that the actual act of "BEING DIVORCED" will allow you to do that? In other words, why is this legal transaction being allowed to control your emotional state?
ILYNOT - just wanted to say one more thing about this. It is always hard when you come to learn something new. Just like you said to me once before, you can control any of that, and it is heartbreaking due to how we love our W. Keep your chin up, drop the rope, focus on you as there is nothing that can be done about what they want. Make note of what she calls you for, what she uses as an excuse to get you to do it. My W starts the conversation with the kids, she knows that I will do everything for them, and then drops what she wants...
M: 34 W: 33 S: 7 S: 14 months BD: 6/2015 Separation: 6/2015 Back and Forth between Home and Moms
Please start a new thread. You have 106 postings/replies.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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