Her mother had it at 38 as well. Tore her family apart and my W never forgave her mom. Guess she's repeating the same thing. My W's mother is so happy ... She has her daughter back .
Her mother is financing all this. She told me to step back and let her go through this. But doesn't care about the destruction.
It's sad
Also she has a cousin with so sort of issue.
My W sister went through something but she's a nurse and was treated with therapy and hormonal treatments
M51 XW43 (38 at bd) BD1 MAY 30 2015 BD2 JUNE 25 2015 by text moved out Aug 2 2015 left both Daughters 13 and 15 (now 18-20) Her divorce Final July 26 2016 Last time she saw her kids Aug 2 2015
Irish, Your MIL is right about one thing, you will need to step back and allow your wife to go through her crisis. There's nothing you can do right now. You didn't break her, therefore you can't fix her.
You will need to protect your assets, i.e., bank account, credit cards, etc. to ensure that you aren't caught up in her spending spree, if she should go on one.
Keep the focus on you and your daughters. I know that this is a difficult time for you and your daughters, but you've got to let her go and figure things out for herself.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Saw a new picture of my W. In the last 40 days she's changed her hair color for the 3rd time
I guess this is identity crisis 101
Do all MLC have this extreme character change?
Still no contact from her to my D's
Or is this some sort of manic depression. A lot of the MLC stories I have read don't have such an extreme personality change as my W is having.
M51 XW43 (38 at bd) BD1 MAY 30 2015 BD2 JUNE 25 2015 by text moved out Aug 2 2015 left both Daughters 13 and 15 (now 18-20) Her divorce Final July 26 2016 Last time she saw her kids Aug 2 2015
Irish, Yes, some of them do have extreme personality changes. My xh took the cake back in 1999-2002. He was all over the place, trying different hairstyles, clothes, food, music, etc.
The reason for all of this is because they are unhappy w/themselves and they are trying to fix the outer shell versus working on the inner shell.
She may not contact your D's for a while. She may look at them as competition because right now, she's a teenager herself. Also, she doesn't want to be reminded of her past, i.e., a mother, wife, etc. So, you will need to give your D's more love and attention. Also, do not be surprised if she finally settles on one of the girls being her best bud. Generally they will select one child, the child who doesn't question/challenge them about their behavior.
Come over to the MLC forum, you'll be surprised at some of the postings and how the posters have had to deal w/the fall out.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I am sorry you are going through this. But the most important thing right now is your daughters, they are at a tough age, they need you! I can not imagine how much this is hurting them right now. You are in a good place to get advice and support, hang in there and keep posting.
Calibri, It's not just the changing of hair color, but the combination of depression and the "extreme" personality changes that signal to me a possible MLC. The highs and lows, swinging this way and that are also symptoms of MLC.
Oh I agree. I just worded it poorly - partially because I was at work and typing fast.
It was more of Irish's comment on the multiple hair colors. That alone, would not signal to me a problem - as I change my hair alot and so do other friends. But yes, combined with everything else - definitely signals that something is up.
:-)
M:32,H 32 T:10, M5 BD/H Move Out: 9/2014 - extreme anger H Mental Illness Diagnosis: 4/15 Served D Papers: 10/15 Divorced: 11/15
