All I can say is... Job, you are right. I will apologize. And I dont know if I want to stand for this M anymore. I NEED to figure that out. , Im all ready to ignore and ready for him to continue ignoring me... Im confused, I dont want to be hurt anymore, I dont want to feel anything for him
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
I dont want this type of M anymore. Me accepting whatever he throws my way. Happy IF and when he decides he wants to spend time with me.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Happy, I don't blame your h one bit, I would ignore you too. It's better than coming out and saying something hurtful. Besides, you've hurt his feelings because he thought he was doing something nice for you. You run hot and cold. He's not a mind reader and doesn't have a crystal ball that tells him what you want on any give day. Here's what I suggest, you both need to sit down and have a conversation about gift giving. Obviously he didn't get the memo that you don't want gifts on the anniversary. If he doesn't know ahead of time, how can he know what you want? Communication is the key. Anger and acting like a spoiled young lady isn't going to get you what you want. I can just see you standing there stomping your feet telling him you didn't want the coffeemaker. Haven't I pointed out this behavior to you before?
Here's the deal, crisis people are numb to their spouses. They are depressed and they don't have feelings for us. Your h has been trying for quite some time to feel something for you. Be grateful for his baby steps.
You've been on the MLC Forum for quite some time and know what happens with the MLCer. Your h is a kinder, gentler MLCer and you should be on your knees thanking the dear Lord that he is. If you can't accept that he may be in crisis for a while longer, then maybe you need to think about doing something different. Maybe the two of you need a break from each other for a while...that will be something that you and your h will need to decide.
Continue to stomp your feet and I won't be surprised to hear that he's decided he's had enough.
I honestly do not have any more advice for you.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Cali you are also right on point with your feedback. I dont feel like I can continue, I just dont know
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
I really did not act out other then slamming the door I was really trying to explain to him that I did not expect a gift or to acknowledge the day at all. It was not what the gift was as much as a gift at all. I prepared to ignore the day expected him to forget, so I could deal wi th the day the best way I could.
I have spoken to H and tried to explain to H, but probably not doing a good job at all. H just said OK and he would return coffee maker since Im not suppose to have coffee often. Ok, I better just stop posting today or talking to H. I need to go to bed and pray and hope I have not caused too much damage. Im soo confused right now.
I do listen and try to apply the advice I receive here. I thought I was doing better,...
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Everyone here who has replied to me ever, I want to say Thank you very much. Job you especially have been here for me. I need to back away from eveything for a while. I dont trust myself to have any more conversation with my H as it relates to our M. I dont know how to clearly express what Im trying to say.
Thank you everyone.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Happy, I think some time away from the forum would do you a world of good. You need to put your focus on what YOU want and how YOU want to go about meeting that goal.
When you are ready to come back, we'll be here to listen and support you on whatever your decision is.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Hello everyone... Just stopping in to update. I've been doing GREAT! My H is still at home and Yes, I'm surprised today I was like wow he is still here. Yes I thought he would be gone by now.
No R talks in I don't even know how long, maybe the last post was the last time.
H is existing like we are all good. I'm GREAT but our R is still in limbo.
I have a new job, which its alot of new things to learn, but I love it. Family and I had great Holiday's.
H does kiss me goodbye more often on his way to work, H is communicating better with me ( he always communicated but it does not seem as fake as it had in the last year)
NEWS FLASH- H has gone to some IC, he tells me it because of the issues he is having at work, told me a couple of things the Counselor said, asking H to go back to his childhood and discuss why he is sooo angry. He had one conversation to me about it, I told him it was a good idea and I hope it helps his job situation. H has never mentioned it again and I have not ask (this was about 1 month ago).
H is still in a fog of sorts, he has admitted to forgetting things etc.
I have been trying to lose weight, focused on my son my new job and being a better me each day!!!
I believe I'm in a very good place right now, I don't dwell or think about the what if as it relates to my M.
I'm prepared either way.
I hope others are doing good. I don't plan to read any posts at this time, sometimes I would read others posts and get more worried or upset about my situation.
I will stop back one day later and read some posts and try to provide support.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
