So today H calls, tells me his flight info and then tells me he put his ring back on. I didn't know what to say. I feel like I'm dealing with Incredible Hulk. Ring on mild mannered husband...ring off MONSTER!
I went to lunch with one of my oldest friends today. We have all been friends for 24 years. She told me they are very worried about me and my H.
I told me H they were concerned for him and he said they need to mind their own business. He is the one who called them and told them we were splitting up. I wasn't going to say anything to them at that point.
It's just so odd how he acts. He will be here around one tomorrow. He actually said he envisioned us all in a group hug-WTH???
That mans cheese has slid completely off his cracker!
That is him on his roller-coaster. Do not strap yourself in and go for that ride!
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
Thank you all for thinking of me. H came in the house, I was busy working in the kitchen and S was in his room. No big production for him and no group hug...LOL!
He talked a little about the stress he is under at work and how he just couldn't deal with me not understanding the pressure he was under so he needed a break. I just listened and tried my best to validate his feelings.
He then wanted to grill out for us and when he got done with that he started mowing.???
I didn't push for any conversation about this sitch, I just smiled and remained calm. He seems nervous, kinda like a cat in a new house ;-)
Today we went to lake and had so much fun. H asked to go and he was actually fun to be around.
We have had a couple of brief talks about what happened. I don't push for it, I'm just letting him take the lead. Validation is working wonders to diffuse the tension. He is showing me positive actions and he did tell me he knows it will take time for me to trust him.
Yesterday, when I needed a break, I went out into my garden and worked. This evening, when we got back, I went shopping for a new garden fountain with my sister. I'm staying focused on me and my son. I'm going to an airsoft war this weekend with S and friends. LOL, it should be fun! H asked if he could still get a ticket. My S said he is welcome to come and stay at the campsite, but we(S and I) are doing this alone.
One goal I have set is for us go to Colorado for a couples session. I'm not going to push for that anytime soon, but if things keep going well eventually I will ask.
Sounds like there's joy in your life in both the interactions with your H and those without him. That's a winning combo in my book.
Good for you for taking some time for yourself to garden and work too. My mom used to say that gardening was her therapy, sounds like it may be for you as well. What are you growing?
Take it to em in the airsoft war! No mercy.
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
I'm so glad you had a fun day, and took some time for yourself! I also like that your S felt confident enough to set boundaries for Dad as well. How did you H feel about that?
Keep up the good work!!
E
M 46 / H 43 T 24/M 18 S 4 11/6/2014 ILYBNILWY 1/16/2015 Living in separate bedroom 1/8/2016 H moved out
