Sherman several of my Gamanon friends have been helping me with research about abuse.
I was sent a link to a Utube talk which is one of the most amusing and funky things I have heard in such a long time. I rocked with laughter as the presenter was so earnest and pithy. I really loved it.
I can't post the link in full but the name is Thomas Sheridan and the smirk on the face. I wanted to share it with you as I think you may find it pyrrhic. Add http to:
/youtu.be/DTjMjZaYFNE
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Watched the video. Another good one to lookup is "Say Goodbye to Crazy". The authors have youtube videos that are hilarious.
Today was pretty good. Picked up S7 from the STBXW at 12:00. We went to Toy-R-Us for the free Legos. Then watched the movie. Came home, hung out with the neighbors and they they're playing the Lego Jurassic Park game I got them this afternoon. They're both saying they had a great time.
On the STBXW front, S7 told her I was adopting FS9. She started texting me this morning about S7. That I should be more firm with him and I'm spoiling him. I explained that he's allowed to express his emotions, but it doesn't change the fact he'll have to visit her.
She then proceeded to tell me that she and S7 have a deal. That she'll give up her evenings during the week (Tues/Thurs) for the summer with him, but will still have him every other weekend for 2 nights. That he can't throw anymore tantrums. She even bought doughnuts for all of us when I'd pick up S7 (odd behavior). She even told me that she was really happy... Went out of her way to state she was being sincere, that I was adopting FS9.
The lawyer has been predicting for over a month that she would give up her time during the week. FS9 gave her the excuse. Didn't take as long as expected.
If it was me, there's no way I'd give up any time with my son. It's baffling to me.
Other thing she did tonight... (my interpretation is she's trying to convince herself) is a Facebook post. How "happiness is being single" Then uses "Mayberry" as the comparison. That the only one who was married was Otis, the town drunk. What a dark perspective.
Last edited by Sherman333; 06/21/1512:16 AM.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
So tonight at bedtime, S7 tells me that he worries about me a lot when he's at his mom's house. That a bad guy/burglar will take me away an that he won't able to save me... That I should know that he's always ready for combat, but hopes that Molly (the dog) will be enough... FS9 piped up at that point to try to reassure S7 that he's here now too to make sure things are safe.
I told him how brave I thought he was for telling mom how he feels. Also, I tried explaining to FS9 that this isn't exactly what S7 was talking about. I'm not sure he got it, but gave him a thank you nonetheless.
At least for the summer, I'll have him most nights. Except 2 nights every 2 weeks. Not a bad trade-off at the moment. I'd prefer something different, but it's not there yet.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
Happy fathers day Sherman. You are an example to us all. What you have to deal with is beyond me and I don't think I could deal with it
I have my 4 all the time save Friday nights when D11 stays with her mom. Reading your posts makes me realise how lucky. I am
Your two boys are so lucky and in time they will reap the reward of being raised by a man with your character
Stay strong mate. Rd
I'm not sure I can take that much credit. But thank you.
I have my perspectives and truly believe that this doesn't define me. I let too much go on for too long. All I'm doing at present is what I wanted to do before, but didn't. I see this as part of me taking charge of things in my life.
As for today, it went really well. We did the train ride, afterwards the gift shop (of course) and the boys each got a necklace... S7 got a arrowhead and FS9 got a rock necklace and a bag of rocks that you can swap out of the necklace.
From there we hit a Mexican restaurant. They both tried fried ice cream for the 1st time. At first their faces were hilarious... after they started eating it though... that took care of that. LOL
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
After we got back, we ended up biking around the lake (just over 5 miles). S7 has done it before with me. But for FS9, he hasn't. I know from his other foster mom that that he hadn't done well with this type of event before. That last time they did a bike ride, he threw a fit in the first mile and they had to go back.
In our case, we were hopping from park to park. We were half way before I got the tantrum. But we're half way. He has to finish for us to get back to the house. Needless to say, we made it home with a lot of complaining, but once we got here, FS9 was all smiles. Very proud of himself for having done it.
From my perspective, it was important to do something like this to build up his confidence. It did a lot for S7 when we first did it weeks ago.
I like cycling and would love for this to become a family thing long term. I could see traveling to different places to do different events. Part of my long term GAL activities.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
Loved the suggestion On Utube certainly made me think.
Could you explain the Maybury thing to a poor old Brit?
Happy fathers day, your two boys are giving you the great gift of love, respect and their confidence.
V
Hi V!
As for reversing... I don't think so. I see this type of thing as manipulation. She knows she crossed the line when she came to pick him up and I called her on it. This is her way of making sure she doesn't have problems or to redirect things. Not that it will make any difference. For instance, with the Apple Watch, I know this was a gift, but in her texts she states she has to pay him back. That he only got it for her to make it easier to train for her marathons... like no one has ever done it without an Apple Watch before. From the way she put it... it's mandatory, so she had to have it.
As for Mayberry.. search for "mayberry andy griffith". It's an old sitcom that shows life in the Southern US around the 1960s? Most of us here in my age bracket watched the show on reruns growing up. Plays on a lot of "typical" things in America during those times. Her post was a perversion of the show. It was originally very family oriented.
Thanks for the Father's Day wishes. They're appreciated.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
But thank you.