The kids were super happy. We told FS9 at this therapist. He was all grins. He was even super talkative (definite sign of how happy his is). Even had a 15 long conversation in the grocery store employee about the lobsters... was really funny.
The STBXW found out from S7 that FS9 was at my place. She dropped off S7 early so they could spend time together. Even bought them dinner. That's something the old her would have done. They were in the driveway when I pulled up. They were sitting in the car. She gave S7 kisses. FS9 got out and S7 rushed out of her car and they started chatting. STBXW, stayed in the car, waiting a moment or 2, then drove off.
I got the kids fed. That's when we told S7 that FS9 wasn't going home. That he was staying. They went swimming after dinner until it was time to come in to get ready for bed. I read them a chapter in a book and they were done.
They're back to calling each other brothers. So happy times.
STBXW did ask if she could have FS9 on the evenings/weekends and I told her no. Multitude of reasons for this... he doesn't need to be exposed to her behavior at the moment and she'll mainly use him just to avoid spending any time with S7.
She hardly interacts with S7 (according to him), just texts on her phone and beyond the initial discussion when she picks him up, she doesn't talk to him. She's only taken him to the park once.
She's also been setting him up in a bind... She let's him watch youtube videos on Minecraft. Last time that the OM dropped by her house (he bought her an Apple Watch and had to drop it off), the STBXW started yelling at S7 for watching Youtube. Who knows what he'd clicked onto, but he was still pretty upset about it when he got back to my place. He also complained about his mom kissing the OM on the lips when she got the watch. He didn't like that either. There's not much I can do about any of it but stay positive for him, let him vent, and validate what he's saying. I don't talk bad about his mother. So it's a fine line.
So tonight they're already asking whether S7 can come home tomorrow vs. go to the STBXW's house. I'll text her tomorrow and see what she says.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Great story... So on the way home from daycare, FS9 asked S7 if it was ok for him to start calling me Dad again or at least after he's been officially adopted.
S7's response was "of course". Later S7, was curled up next to me watching cartoons and he stated "isn't it great dad, you have 2 sons now". I told him "of course!".
STBXW, did give up her time tonight for S7 to be home. He'd asked me to contact her this morning to ask. She's still planning on having him Friday night and he's not happy about going.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
I'm so damn pissed and annoyed at the STBXW. It's supposed to be her weekend (I get father's day).
She's given up time with Sloan on a regular basis. Tomorrow she's letting me pick him up at 12:00 p.m. to spend the rest of the weekend with him. I got the kids a little early from latchkey and let her know to pick him up at the house. She stated she wouldn't be her until later around 6.
So she's on her way and S7 starts to get upset and throw a fit. I got him out to the driveway and he starts throwing a fit and crying. Stating that he's not going. She just starts threatening him and yelling about the concessions she's made; that if he doesn't get in the car she won't make any concessions anymore. That he'll regret being defiant.
He stormed into the house. She starts reiterating her threats at me. I told her I already know what she said... she then yelled at me that I'm interrupting her (like always) so I let her go through it again. I reiterated that she can knock off the threats and I'll get him.
Then I mentioned that it's a nice Apple Watch she has (mainly to deflect things a bit off of S7) as it's new. She said it was a gift... I told her I know. It's from the platonic "friend".
I came into the house and explained to him that he needs to go. That eventually, when we go in front of the judge that there won't be a choice. It's better to work through this now.
We went back outside and he's in absolute tears. Racking sobs. She yelled at Sloan that eventually he needs to spend time with her too, that she's going to stop giving concessions. And then she starts yelling at me that I'm feeding into all this. I looked directly at her and told her I'm supporting her in this. That she needs to be kinder to S7.
I turned to him and reiterated some of what I told him earlier. He got to the car, made face that had a lot of anger and yelled his frustration. I told him "you need to go bud." He says "I'm not mad at you Dad, I'm mad at Mom". He got in the car and they drove away. I know she's yelling at him all the way home and will be taking this out on him.
At the moment I could tell her no. But it would cause issues to things long term. Of course she insinuated it's my fault too.
Heck of a start to the weekend. This cr@p is hard.
Last edited by Sherman333; 06/19/1510:57 PM.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
Those two are so lucky to be with someone like you. Have a great fathers day over the weekend, you definitely deserve it.