Part 19 - keeping on keeping on

[Dawn70]

A very full positive day....I LOVE it, Edz! Good for you. Glad to hear Avengers was good. Looking forward to seeing it with the nephew this weekend. Take care, Edz! Sounds like things are going well.

[edz]

Thanks Dawn, you'll love it if you liked the first one.

Things seem positive, still keeping my expectations under control though, w hasnt promised me anything yet despite all her positivity and coming closer. It seems less likely to me she would, after all this, say she wants to divorce but its still a possibility so I need to have that in mind.

W called this afternoon and I'm now taking s swimming tonight then dropping him back, no idea if there will then be coffee or chatting safer to expect not and then see what happens.

Thanks again all

[Sotto]

Hi Edz. All sounding pretty good there, and you are doing really well with the holding back, patience and PMA. Good for you. Hope you and S have a nice swim.

Just out of interest, has S commented/asked much about recent developments and changes? What do you think he makes of it all?

As you say, W hasn't promised anything and seems to need more time/wants to be sure. So best to just carry on as you are and keep managing those expectations as you're doing.

Have a nice evening :-)

[edz]

Hi toots.

It was a nice swim and w did invite me in and made me a quick meal since I hadn't eaten apart from a quick sandwhich, chilled evening apart from s feeling a little left out when it was his bed time but managed to settle him wasn't there too late and back for 10:30. Hug and a kiss on her head at the door.

On s,he hasn't asked specifics, both w and I have stayed on the theme we both love him and that won't change no matter what. That's simply because neither of us can promise anything else yet. He must see it since I'm now at the flat several times a week tucking him in etc and we've all been out together several times.

I suspect he hopes mummy and daddy are heading back to being together and has a habit of saying he loves everyone in the room or in the car, w has said she thinks us rebuilding is the absolute best for him but, as I say, neither of is is making promises.

Drove Home with a positive feeling and chilled out (well after sorting bfts litter and putting the swimming gear in the washing machine) still no commitments but a friend of hers invited her to a family event and has now extended that to bringing me as well I do feel were slowly moving closer but thats still not a commitment to work on our m ...yet.

Just keeping those expectations under control

[edz]

Well good morning all (just)

Not too much to report on today. Up, exercised (increased some of the pull ups today) and the usual and then work with a side order of washing, feeding BFT and dishes!

A bit of a grey one out there but didnt stop the BFT jumping on me, my keyboard, desk and finally windowsill (complete with loud purring and occasional meowing into my right ear) though.

Nothing from w today yet, she did have some issues with WFT waking her up about midnight so we were fb chatting for a while, sending pics of the other day that I took and she took of s and i and s and w, was getting late and Im not sure why but on one of the last posts following comments on loopy cats and the WFT being a pest I did add "love you both" (meaning s and w) - must have just been tired - realised as I did it and was expecting nothing or a disparaging slow down comment but got back is that me and the cat, so said "oh ok all three of you then" and got a thumbs up and smile back.

Wont make a habit of that yet but left me in a positive frame of mind.

So next thing on my agenda is some new clothes (again) for tomorrow night. Casual dress at the place we're off to so thinking black chinos and a nice fitted linen shirt...hmmm.... M&S menswear calleth me tomorrow I do believe (s will not be happy, he hates hates hates shopping) may go tonight and buy him off with a mcdonalds trip lol!

Also need to pick up my dress watch from the jewellers just not had an opportunity recently.

Spoke to "wow" friend this morning to confirm as I wasnt sure if she was expecting me to pick s up after dinner or if he's staying ("Wow" friend is mum of one of s's best friends) she said nope not expecting me to as they'll have a sleepover so thats good insofar as meaning theres no rushing around. I'm not expecting anything after dinner though to be clear, maybe a nice coffee and some talking nothing else yet.

S's math tutor in the morning and w is coming along for coffee (we dont go in with him) so quite a busy one (always seems to be nowadays, what a change from pre-bd!)

Catch you all later!

[edz]

S just dropped around and bouncy as ever

W cant make tomorrow for maths now as MIL/FIL are doing the garage again (slight 'Grrrrrrr' internally but I'm resigned to this now it's still her call to sort and enforce boundaries there and, to be honest, it means I can get to the shops and get clothes for tomorrow night and pick my watch up ready after maths with s which I'd feel wouldn't be the best idea if w chose to spend time with me tomorrow morning) so no need for shops tonight or McDonalds (didn't tell s that bit !)

It was interesting she was apologetic about it, was a great opportunity to show that I dont need to hang onto her though hopefully validates the dropping of codependency. I said it was a shame but we'll have time together tomorrow night at dinner so no problems and we'll get coffee next week when he goes.

Does mean I'll be cooking, meatballs with chilli and tomato sauce and tagliatelle for me, meatballs tomato and penne for s.

Some games, some tv and then a nice chilled evening before bed is the plan.

Noticed that w is notably more relaxed around me now, lots of small non verbal changes - hand down relaxed pose (comes of trying to learn to read non verbal communications better as I was woefully bad at it), even coming over for a hug before leaving. It feels rather nice after definitely being outside her personal space bubble for a very long time.

Anyhoo finishing this work call off then dinner time, catch you all later.

[Vanilla]

Warmer and warmer Edz, I don't mean the weather.

Saying it again, Castle strategy. picnic with V, Toots, Gan, Gg, RD, OD and the rest of the Kindergarten crew with S and BFT (high on tuna). cheeeeeese , Pedro and Moose calls.


Smiling ear to ear, dearest Edz.

V

[edz]

Moooooooooose

[edz]

Morning all

Just getting the day started here, need to get the exercises done, s up and fed and then to his maths lesson and on.

Not much from w last night, apart from a couple of pics I pinged and a YouTube video link she sent me of stand up on being a parent (v funny indeed). Again no stress over this as she may just need some space to chill.

Looking forward to dinner as I said few expectations beyond dinner and talking what ever else happens (coffee and chatting and company) would be a lovely extra. We shall see.

Have a great day everyone.

[Ggrass]

Nice edzs, you definately deserve it.

I'm super happy things are turning right around for you.