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Originally Posted By: Kramer
Yes, definitely unfriend her.

Hey newpand,

I hope you'll take our advice and unfriend your W on Facebook.

You'll get thru this.

Bob


Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS)
M:14 yrs
T:15 yrs
No children together--3 each from previous marriages
Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14
Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14
Divorce Final: 10/21/15
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Obviously you must be on your computer if you are reading this.

So unfriend right this instant. NOW.

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Here's the deal about having her on your facebook feed:

It will drive you totally bonkers. Your mind will invent crazy stories to go with every innocent picture, comment, or post she makes.

It's not healthy for you. Do yourself a favor and don't have her be on your radar this way.

Its the same reason people shouldn't snoop on their spouse in most occasions. It just makes you nutz.


Me: 35 Her (WAW): 34
D8, S5, D2
T:16, M:9
BD + D: 4/3/2015
EA Confirmed 5/6/2015
Separation under the same roof
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newpand Offline OP
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I actually read these posts on my phone, on the way home from shopping (she got the car, so I'm bussing it now). And that turned out to be a good thing-- my first reaction to the idea of unfriending her was negative, but having the time on the bus ride to think about it made me realize that yeah, the only thing I'm gaining by being her facebook friend is knowledge of her latest adulterous romps.

So I did indeed unfriend her just now. And I already do feel a bit better. Thanks, all.

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I am standing an mentally high fiving you right now.

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I am sending you a high five, too!

Good for you newpand! wink

Bob


Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS)
M:14 yrs
T:15 yrs
No children together--3 each from previous marriages
Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14
Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14
Divorce Final: 10/21/15
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The Facebook thing can go either way. I deleted my H bc I didn't want to see his stuff but I also didn't want him to know what I was doing. Others say it's good to have them on there so they can see all the fun stuff you're doing.

I'm wishy washy on the topic. I could see either way. I think it depends on the spouse. come to find out my H went on his friends FB to check my page


M 31 H 34
S 6 S 9
BD 2/14 Piecing 8/14
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newpand Offline OP
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I don't post anything to Facebook, so that's not a concern; and the truth of what everyone was saying hit home because of how many times over the weekend I looked just to see if she'd slipped up and posted something about her camping trip (because her co-workers would see it). There was nothing good about my doing so. And unfriending makes in unpossible.

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newpand Offline OP
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For #*%&% sake.. she's done with her weekend-long romantic camping trip with OM, and this morning I get a text from her saying "Hey. You want to get together some time?"

From the very beginning she has been utterly oblivious to the effects of her actions upon me. I can't help but fantasize about replying to her message with retorts like

"Depends. Do you want to stop committing adultery?"
"As much as I would want to shove my face into a pile of burning charcoal."
"Are you insane?"
"Ask me again after the divorce is legally finalized."

but obviously she just wouldn't get it. So for now I'm just going to ignore it. Recommendations are welcomed.

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newpand Offline OP
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I wonder if an appropriate response would be to say that I am not going to have a friendly R with her for as long as she is continuing to [shamelessly] commit adultery. ...that's a boundary, isn't it?

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