Well, my 2015 has started out with my car heading to that big scrap heap in the sky! Yet, strangely enough, I feel blessed. It at least waited for today and didn't die on the highway last night. It died in front of a library so I had somewhere warm to wait for the tow truck and I no longer have to stress about how much money I was gonna pour into that car or what's gonna go wrong next! My mechanic said "crush it". My Mom has offered to lend me the money for a car and I can pay her back bit by bit. I also texted my Pastor to let him know that I won't be at church for awhile ( my church is a long way from where I live). He's in Tennessee right now visiting his daughter. I know people are concerned when I don't show up so I asked him to let people know my sitch and I hope to be back soon. He texted me back saying that when he gets back next week maybe he could pick me up for church on his way in on Saturday's. He lives further away than I do but goes past me on his way in. I actually burst into tears! Again, I feel very blessed. Anyway, happy 2015 everyone. God is good.
This morning I was out the door at 8:40 am hoping to get to the church by 10:00 am for Sabbath School...I got there at 9:20 am. Awesome! The buses were excellent. I sat through half the first service, Sabbath School and the second service. I looked behind me and two rows back was a lady from my church! I went over to chat for a minute and say hello. Nice to see her. "Amen guy" was there too! (SDA Lady and I used to refer to him as the "Amen guy" cuz he's Amen-ing constantly) The sermon today in summary was "get up off your judgmental asses and do something constructive for others!" I've shortened it slightly lol. My trip home took 50 minutes in a big snowstorm. Not bad at all. I also discovered a bus route to my old church which is just two buses and should take a little more than an hour. So, if Pastor can't pick me up on a Saturday I can take the bus...it will cost me $14 but it's possible. I'm also going to contact Pastor and ask him if I take the bus to bible study on Wednesday night would he be able to drop me home on his way. Should be no problem. My brother also called and said he'd be willing to go car shopping with me and take me to the garage he uses where they sell used cars and he trusts the owner big time. He's used him for years. So, we shall see. Again, God has been good to me.
They towed the Rustmobile away today. I found an organization that sells cars to wreckers and donates the proceeds to charity. There's a list of eligible charities to choose from. I chose the Adventist Development & Relief Agency. I contacted them at 1 pm and it was gone by 4:15 pm....so bye bye Rustmobile. It was also my first day busing...and frigidly cold but, hey, the trip took me an hour and all the connections were good. I'm thinking of busing to Bible Study Wednesday night as long as Pastor can drop me home afterwards. I'll text him tomorrow. It's funny, but I cringe at asking people to do things for me or to accept their offers of doing things for me. I'm used to being the doer not the receiver. Maybe the Lord is trying to teach me something here. We shall see. That's my life for now.
Well, now I've got the flu...it just keeps getting better lol. First the sensor on my camera blew (4-8 weeks to fix), then a few days later my car dies and is scrapped, and now I have the flu...after travelling back and forth for an hour each way on public transit in -10-20 C temperatures. I texted Pastor this morning and told him not to pick me up and it's a good thing I did. I feel like crap. Also the heater in my living room just died and somebody ripped off my heater at work. I'm just waiting for my turtle to say "why don't you just curse God and die". Seriously though, I can't imagine how the homeless could live in this...it's beyond me. Anyway, if you're still with me, I have a question. I have a co-worker who lives about two minutes away from me and people keep asking why I don't ask her to drop me off after work. She knows my situation, where I live and it's barely out of her way. Part of the reason I don't ask is that I'm stubborn and don't want to depend on someone else. The other reason is I don't want to put someone in a position by asking where they have to say yes whether they want to or not. She's not responsible for my transportation, I am. I also don't want a co-worker resenting me as a pain. My boss asked me why I didn't ask her and I said that if my co-worker wants to offer she will, if she doesn't she won't and I don't want to put her in an uncomfortable situation by asking... and so far she hasn't offered. Am I correct in my thinking or am I being a stubborn old mule?
I will say to you what I say to my sons GF, it is okay to ask for help. I know you don't want to look like you need help, but people are more often than not willing to give it. Let them.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
But if I ask she can't very well say no without looking bad...so I don't ask. If she asked me, that would be different. My Pastor asked me, and although I accepted, I have a hard time with it. I've been thinking about this and I think part of my issue is a lack of trust in people. If I let you do something for me then you can let me down. If I do it myself you can't. So it may not be a fierce independent nature but more a fearful lack of trust!
People in the helping profession often have difficulties asking for help. Maybe because you fear rejection. Maybe you fear she will say No?. I have a hard time asking for help too. I should be able to manage it on my own. Otherwise Im weak?. Ask her for a lift and buy her breakfast. And what happened with mom offering to help with buying u a car?.
M 53 D 20 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”
