You've had a setback. We all have them and this one is rather typical. Inviting her over (pursuing) to hang out is NOT on the agenda right now. She's angry and hurt and it is TOO EARLY to be hanging out. Space. Time. More Space and More Time.
Stop pursing. Don't call, text, email. Back off. Go hang out with friends. Fill your days with things not W related. Seriously, do this. Pick up a hobby. Occupy your mind and body in other ways. Walks, bowling, reading, jogging, cooking... anything!!!
Keep your communications strictly business but be friendly. No hanging out. Talk only about the logistics of the children. Smile. Look good. Smell good.
Go back to the basics and DO THEM. Don't pursue. Just don't.
Proud of myself. She tried to bait me into another fight about when to pick up my kids and I didn't take the bait. Taking the advice and letting the anger go.
Still a roller coaster of emotion. Cry alone though. Good days and bad days. Right now I cant help but feel lonely as well as empty. I feel my sense of loss.
Starting to let go. As much as I love and miss her; I cant lay here in the hole I dug forever.
Ive heard two rock bottom comments that stuck:
"two ways you can go when you hit rock bottom. straight up or sideways" I think Reba said that!
The other was:
"Thats when I hit rock bottom. And then the bottom fell out."
I feel my rock bottom was when I [censored] up Jan 2 of this year and went on a 2 day alcohol bender. I made good choices and we had a temporary reconciliation. But Taken as a whole; She closed her emotional door "put the last brick in the wall" on Jan 2.
Still a roller coaster of emotion. Cry alone though. Good days and bad days. Right now I cant help but feel lonely as well as empty. I feel my sense of loss.
Starting to let go. As much as I love and miss her; I cant lay here in the hole I dug forever.
Ive heard two rock bottom comments that stuck:
"two ways you can go when you hit rock bottom. straight up or sideways" I think Reba said that!
The other was:
"Thats when I hit rock bottom. And then the bottom fell out."
I feel my rock bottom was when I [censored] up Jan 2 of this year and went on a 2 day alcohol bender. I made good choices and we had a temporary reconciliation. But Taken as a whole; She closed her emotional door "put the last brick in the wall" on Jan 2. I just took to mid July for reality to come into play.
It was July 24 when the bottom to fall out and that is where I needed to truly be before healing and self growth can take place. My raw and unadulterated self is still hurts badly and I am still reeling from the blow. Im afraid it will take a lifetime to ever get better.
But what you do to others you do to yourself. and like I said. It just hurts and I dont want to loose what selfless qualities I have.
Corinthians 4:16-18
16 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Still a roller coaster of emotion. Cry alone though. Good days and bad days. Right now I cant help but feel lonely as well as empty. I feel my sense of loss.
Starting to let go. As much as I love and miss her; I cant lay here in the hole I dug forever.
Ive heard two rock bottom comments that stuck:
"two ways you can go when you hit rock bottom. straight up or sideways" I think Reba said that!
The other was:
"Thats when I hit rock bottom. And then the bottom fell out."
I feel my rock bottom was when I [censored] up Jan 2 of this year and went on a 2 day alcohol bender. I made good choices and we had a temporary reconciliation. But Taken as a whole; She closed her emotional door "put the last brick in the wall" on Jan 2.
It took till July 24 for the bottom to fall out.
Only when you have nothing you are truly free.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18
16 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Sorry to see you join us. It is a sadenning situation for sure. I am pending a separation myself, trying to get through it day by day. Prayers out to you my friend, keep your head up!
ME: 29 / W: 29 M: 10 (11 in March 2015) BD (ILYBNILWY): 07/26/14 S:12 / S: 7 "We need to separate" : 08/31/14 Wants to see others: 10/11/14 Separation looming
Wife is totally moved out now. Took all the pictures of the kids. That was kinda painful And I still miss her like crazy but giving her space. Am resisting the facebook stalking as well as contacting here. Just afraid I will breakdown and plead for here back.
Am working on me. There is an Iron Man in july im training for. The training keeps me sober as well as busy. Getting an A in chemistry and flirt a bit with some cute girls in the class. And I get my kids every saturday and drop them off on tuesday. The alone part is the hardest for me right now.
My prayers go out to everyone in this situation. I wouldnt wish this kinda pain on my enemy.
