TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
Just talked to the kids. D was practically crying and said she has been fussy all day because she missed me so much. It made me cry and I told her it won't be long still she gets to be with me all the time. She said it will take so long. I told her she will be here before you know it.
Of course J had to talk to me and was telling me the kids will be tired because OW's kids get up at the crack of dawn every morning. He also added that "it gets really old". Poor J. He also told me how he had to get up in the middle of the night because of the storms and he had to be outside by himself in the pouring rain.
I told him I wasn't signing him up for volunteer hours. He didn't really respond. I guess we will see if he is capable of getting it done all by himself. But then again if he can fix an RV in the pounding rain he can manuever a website to sign up for 5 hours right? ; )
I won't be calm and relaxed until these kids are back in my care.
WH
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
So I am on vacation. Loving it. Loving the mountains, loving my kids and even loving the drive. I can't believe it but it doesn't bother me at all. The only thing is when you are the driver you can't see the scenery as well. But it still doesnt bother me.
J had called yesterday am and said he was just leaving the campground at 11:30 (I was supposed to have them back by noon) and I could just pick them up at his place at 1:00. I was p*ssed because I missed those kids like nobody's business and I wanted to get on the road. J said he was sorry but things came up. Sure. But I let it go and said I understood and asked if it was possible to meet him somewhere. He offered to have OW drop off the kids because they drove separately but I declined. Politely. I texted S and asked him to let me know asap when they were in town. About 30 minutes later S texts me they are in town and J was coming to my place. Sure enough he pulled in then. I asked him why he did that and he said he figured I missed the kids so he just stopped by. That was good and I thanked him for that. We chatted about school and soccer he took the dog, the kids and I loaded up and off we went. Good trip. I was happy to be going eastbound rather than westbound on the tollroad since there was a semi which jackknifed and caught on fire and had traffic backed up for miles on the westbound side. Ugh. I felt so bad for those people.
On the way to my mom's, S was telling me all the sordid details about J and OW. How they bicker then get all schmoopie. How OW won't stop badgering J about anything until he tells her she's right (ugh). How OW calls J on his cell phone while he's using the map feature on his phone to intentionally tick him off, etc. I guess when they were at the campground J left to get firewood and S was inside the camper doing something. When J got back D was missing. He asked OW were D was and OW had no clue and just brushed it off like it was no big deal. S said J was furious with Ow and said he left her in charge and she said she had no idea she was supposed to watch D because J never asked her to.
This is match made in heaven guys. It's like a remake of dumb and dumber.
WH
Last edited by wishing, hoping; 08/15/1404:03 AM.
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
Sorry, I didn't see your question about the converter. I messed up on the link.
This is like the model I have, mine works great. I haven't tried this one and can't recommend it, but you can look around locally; I think I got mine at Radio Shack.
M:54, H:55 T:33, M:27 12/13 BD: EA 01/14 BD: PA, H leaves 03/14 H & OW break up 05/14 H says he will file for D 08/14 H initiates D 09/14 H wants to R 12/14 Still bungling our way through R
Had a wonderful vacation. Lots of driving but it was nice scenery. I was sure exhausted after all that driving but back to the real world today.
So the deal with J was that for his camping trip he took my Sunday night and switched my Mon/Tues for his Wed/Thurs. Since he took my Sunday night I told him originally I was going to take last night (his Wednesday) and drop them off today (Thursday). So then we would be Back on schedule. We stopped at a hotel Tuesday night so I called him to reiterate what the plan was. He seemed to be on board with it and I was shocked and surprised that he gave me no grief. Well...it didn't last long.
S texted J to let him know about the other things that were going on this serried on top of the soccer tournament. I knew then there was gonna be an issue. At 9:00 J calls and leaves a message. I call back and he is mad. He says he is irritated that I didn't drop off the kids tonight. I am flabbergasted. My jaw dropped. I said I told you I was keeping the kids tonight and dropping them off tomorrow. He said but you told me you would be getting back late. I said it is late. He said you should have dropped them off. I re-explained to him that he took my Sunday so I took Wed night. I told him this was my plan from the get-go. I originally was going to take Thursday too and let him take another Sunday but decided not to. He then told me he hasn't seen the kids for seven days and our agreement says it is supposed to be a seven day max for one parent taking the kids. I told him when he had the kids for spring break he had them more than seven days and I never said a word. He disagreed with me and said it wasn't accurate. I told him it was because he had the kids from Wed night until the following Friday morning. He stopped and said well I guess it ends up evening out and said he just missed the kids a lot. I told him I understood and I missed the kids badly when he had them too. He said he was just frustrated because S was planning stuff for the weekend and it was busy already and he doesn't get to spend time with the kids. Now whose fault is that?
I am trying to change the way I interact with him. He expects anger and I am trying to get rid of the anger and drop the defensiveness (but still keep my guard up). And I often wonder if something is really wrong with him? He just doesn't act right. I honestly think he cannot recall conversations. Which is why I put everything in email with him. And I told S to text things to his dad so he has proof in writing of when and what he said because J is pulling the "you never said that" card with him. S told me when his dad was taking the kids to the zoo the other weekend J needed his GPS to find the way to the zoo. And he still got lost. Now this may not sound like a big deal but the zoo is really easy to find and it's right off the highway. Signs are all over. And we have lived in this area for 15 years. We have both been to the zoo numerous times. I could get there with my eyes closed. And J is the one who showed me how to get around in the city. He knows it like the back of his hand. I think it's really odd that he can't find his way to a huge locale like the zoo.
Any way it's a busy weekend for all of us. I personally am ready to go back on vacation.
WH
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
I'm glad you and the kids had a good time and arrived there and back safely.
As for "J", depression/mlc do tend to mess w/their memory. They have the memory of a gnat. So, don't "expect" him to remember things all of the time. The best thing to do is follow up your calls w/a very short email/text w/whatever he needs to be aware of. Keep the missives short because he will not remember half of what you've written. Their attention span is that of a gnat too.
I hope you'll be able to get a bit of rest to recover from the vacation. It's tough when you have to drive a long distance, unpack and get back on schedule again.
Hang in there!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
And I often wonder if something is really wrong with him? He just doesn't act right. I honestly think he cannot recall conversations.
Yeah - pretty typical.
My ex has never come out of this part (although, to be honest, I think some brain issues from multiple concussions also play a role). To this day, we'll have an email exchange, and a month later he'll write to me as if the previous conversation never happened.
