CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on....

[GoatGal]

CSan00,

You certainly have had a rough time of it.
I can only imagine what you're going through right now, how painful it must be for you.

I'm just sorry to hear you're in such a bad place tonight.

Hang in there.

---GG

[Maybell]

Sending you positive vibes tonight.

[CS000]

T0- Thank you for the support. I guess I feel all over the place. I'm glad my STBXH went to MC regardless of how it ended. I had more insight or epiphanies on how my unwillingness to be vulnerable, listening to my family on matters between my 1st XH, letting my family's opinions be the deciding factor in my decisions with regards to my life, marriage and children; this really hurt my 1st M. I see now how I didn't put my STBXH needs first like he did with me and only put my kids and family's needs first. Nor did I make the effort he did like with my kids and family. I was really selfish. I don't want to be selfish in any relationship period. I want to be happy, giving and loving. I also want to be a better parent. Getting to these goals is the hard part.....Anyways, I hope everyone is having a great 4th of July!

[CS000]

Thank you GG. It is a better day today and I am dealing with things as best as I can. I have read a bit of your sitch and you definitely show resilience!

MB, thanks for the positive thoughts! I'm glad we have this place to help each other :-)

[CS000]

I do wonder if Sandi2 or labug can advise on DBing after the divorce is final? I just wonder on how to apply this as I am rereading DR. Thoughts??

I'm also in my new apartment for the first night and I feel sad at how things are...really trying to look at it in a positive way but finding it really hard. Praying for strength and guidance

[Maybell]

I'm not Sandi or labug but there is a forum for DBing after divorce if you look down the list.

You know, I think the positive light you're looking for is in your 8 pm post. Realizing your part in the relationship is a really big deal. Whatever your future holds, that knowledge is priceless. Hold onto it. I bet this understanding makes your life better no matter what.

Best to you.

[CS000]

I called my STBXH to meet up for breakfast which I shouldn't have done as I should just back off as he doesn't want a relationship and I need to respect his space. He has not initiated contact since the MC and that should be an indication that it was too much for him especially with me crying during it. I need to let go

[CS000]

Just Journaling-

I worked out today twice so I am pretty happy I did it. I just need to make it a priority to do more for myself and to feel better. I'm also looking to read my self improvement books too. Even thinking of going to church tomorrow morning.

[Maybell]

Hi, CSan. I'm glad you got out and did stuff, and that you're looking ahead to tomorrow. Did you look in those other threads?

[CS000]

Hi MB,

I did look and I will have to move my thread there. I suppose I still want hope but can't seem to get my head clear. I am hoping by just getting out and not dwelling on the MC session or how to proceed with my STBXH that I will get some clarity and just center myself. Not sure if that even makes sense however with my D 17 leaving this past Thursday and feeling even more emotional than usual, things are jumbled for me. Thank you MB!