Still trying to save my family - part 11

[Scorp7]

What I was saying was that I know that the kids love the acreage and for that reason it's brutal to realize I'm going to need to sell.

There are a few reasons. One is that it's not looking like it will be likely that the court will order the kids to come back to my province.

The second is that the longer I delay in starting to live 50/50 the harder it will be to get.

Financially it would be a huge stretch to maintain on my own. If my kids were for sure coming back to my province I would find a way to keep it.

If I do buy a place over in her province I would look for an acreage just outside of town. The prices of acreages there are quite a bit cheaper if I went with a place that was older but still in good shape. That way the kids would still get the country life that they love.

[Drew]

One is that it's not looking like it will be likely that the court will order the kids to come back to my province.

Based on????

Facts or feelings?

Whatever happened to the temporary custody order?

[Scorp7]

I'd already been told by a couple of lawyers that it was highly unlikely a court would order the kids back to my province at this point. My current lawyer has not ruled it out, she also has not said that she thinks it's likely.

I have my affidavit pretty much ready to go for the temp custody order. My lawyer thinks it's a good idea to see what my W's response is to being served with D papers before we file the temp custody order.

[Drew]

How long does she have to respond? 30 days?

Time works in her favor.

So does being nice to you .....

[Scorp7]

She has to respond within 20 days of being served.

If I make the move then it would remove any excuses about why the kids could not be with me half the time due to distance, schools, etc.

I will still do whatever I need to regardless of her being nice to me. I'm being nice to her as well even though I just served her with D papers last week and am preparing an interim custody order.

[Wonka]

Scorp,

Stay the course! Don't waver or quiver....you've got this.

[Scorp7]

I'm back after having my kids with me for the past 6 days. What a week! The time together was so special for them and for me. They are begging to be with me all the time so I am going to do some fairly drastic things to make that happen asap.

Firstly I am going to list the acreage for sale this week. I am doing this so I can move to be with my kids and buy a new acreage over there as soon as the old place sells.

Until then I'm going to move over to the town they're in and rent a place. With luck the old place will sell right away. I'm doing this so I can start having my kids with me half the time. My W hasn't agreed to this yet. I can't wait around for her to decide to go along with this, I'm doing this for my kids.

Other than that, I did send my W some pics from my week with the kids. I did step away from the rules briefly and asked if we could talk. I also told her my feelings for her haven't changed and that they would not change. She didn't respond with much but she did send me a picture of our kids from Easter that she had done.

[Scorp7]

Missing my family today SO MUCH. This pain is unreal. It's been nearly 7 months and I honestly think I'm still in shock with what's happened.

I can't get over to my W's town fast enough. I just pray that she will see how much the kids need me and what I'm willing to do to make that happen and not stand in the way. If that can happen then who knows.

[Wonka]

Scorp,

Glad you got to spend some quality time with your kids! It is a positive that W is allowing this to happen. She is very, very slowly thawing in that regard.

I did step away from the rules briefly and asked if we could talk. I also told her my feelings for her haven't changed and that they would not change. She didn't respond with much but she did send me a picture of our kids from Easter that she had done.

She ins't interested in talking with you at all! STFU about wanting to talk with W or anything remotely close to it. Forget it. Zip it.

Photo exchanges are good. A bit at a time. In my case, it took me years and years before Ms. Wonka and I were able to talk together. In the beginning, say the first 6 months, she was one hard big ol' glacier that was immovable! I sent her photos of our dog and she finally sent me one of our cat. That took 6 long months for that to happen.

You're gonna need to learn to be patient and exercise patience with this whole process. You've yet to learn this elementary tool in DBing. Work on it!

[Scorp7]

Thanks Wonka. Are you and Ms Wonka back together? My memory is a bit foggy but I thought I'd read you are back together? I can stay patient as long as I need to, I can't imagine giving up on our family. I'm getting pretty worn down with trying to deal with everything, I have to find a way to keep going.

You're right, I was pursuing big time. Hearing my kids talk so much about wanting their Mom home with us last week really got to me. I was thinking the same thing, I've thought of little else.

I'm going to list the house this week and plan to let my W know about it. She'll have to sign the sales agreement anyway so she'll obviously have to know.

Not sure I will tell her about my plan to move to her area in the next couple of weeks or not. I think I should let her know, it feels like the right thing to do. Depending on how long it takes to sell the acreage I may be back here for the summer when my kids are off school so the move may be temporary. I'd hope the acreage would sell by the fall and then I can look to buy something over there then.