Well I am being feeling down because of the whole no contact situation and I am kind of scared that leaving to Hawaii will cause her to think that I dont want to really work on the M, however I think she is the one not interested in working since she has not contacted me at all.
Also I keep wondering myself how can she only have in her mind those bad things she said I did, when she never communicated those things neither she told me her daily life...
When the student its ready, the teacher will appear... Even after all this time the sun never says to the Earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that,It lights the whole sky.
Well I am being feeling down because of the whole no contact situation and I am kind of scaredthat leaving to Hawaii will cause her to think that I dont want to really work on the M, however I think she is the one not interested in working since she has not contacted me at all.
Also I keep wondering myself how can she only have in her mind those bad things she said I did, when she never communicated those things neither she told me her daily life...
Considering the recent advice you've gotten hear about your "fear" issues, Ye, I think the time away would do you good. You're still WAY too enmeshed in what you think she thinks about you.
Sorry I can't add more, but I haven't been following your sitch all that closely.
Do you think Starsky that I should do any movement towards this? Or should I just leave things the way they are right now?
When the student its ready, the teacher will appear... Even after all this time the sun never says to the Earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that,It lights the whole sky.
Well I never realized how many things I have, this showed me one of my flaws.... My happiness was related to the amount of material things I could get, its stressing and a big demotivation to get ready of so many things, but little by little I am selling them, I still have to sell the furniture and the tv so hopelly I will get the energy to put them up on craiglist, meanwhile I am feeling more detached than ever... Its kind of weird to feel like this I guess its part of the recovery proccess
When the student its ready, the teacher will appear... Even after all this time the sun never says to the Earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that,It lights the whole sky.
I am glad you are on a path that excites you about your future. I am a bit concerned about something but I don't want you to begin to doubt yourself too much just b/c I am asking some questions, okay?
But WHY Hawaii? I know Wayne Dyer lives there, but he's very wealthy. It's an expensive place to live.
There are many sunny places to live in this nation that are cheaper, if you want good weather. And many places with colleges and schools exist elsewhere.
Have you done enough research to know where you'll live when you get there? Are you familiar with the people there? My husband and some of his family live in Hawaii, and they are not Hawaiian. There were preferences for Hawaiians and you may need to prepare yourself for a different job market there, especially if that is still the case.
Just want to make sure you realize there are MANY places in our country that you can live. It's not just New York City or Hawaii...and btw, Hawaii is mostly urban, OR privately owned land.
If you want more nature, there are other options...what is it you are most looking for? As far as school, would you like to finish a 4 year college degree?
What would you like to study? Think it all out...bring it up here and we can help you think things out.
But I get the feeling you are looking for a geographic solution to "fix" it all and the problem is that your choice of area is NOT cheaper than New York; it's more expensive. Real Estate is very limited b/c it's an island.
We used to be in the military and we moved often. I'm used to picking up and starting over and I meet people easily. Even so, it's not easy. And my kids HATED starting over. They are much shyer than me. They don't enjoy being the new kid" at all. My suggestion is that no matter where you move, you make plans NOW for how you will find a place to live, a job to apply for (several) and at least one class to sign up for so you can meet people and keep your mind active.
What else might you do to keep your mental attitude positive and to GAL wherever you go? Those ideas^^ (GAL, PMA, classes) are some tools for "how to be happy". So when you ask us "how can" you change, or learn something, THAT is one way how...(GAL, doing things in a different way, etc)
Make sense?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
BTW is this the right thread? I had some trouble finding you b/c there seem to be many threads of yours.
Which one is yours or the main one? It really helps us stay up to date, if you keep to ONE thread at a time...
is this "the one"?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
I moved to NY 7 years ago with 0 level of english after I finish my contract in the marines in Spain. I moved to NY because I knew that it was the city where I could find the biggest amount of spanish people and I will be able to move myself around talking spanish till I learn english. The reason why I moved to USA 7 years ago it was because I always wanted to live in Hawaii, it was my dream...but with no english at all I tought it was crazy to do that movement right away. I started after 2 years working for a surf company in Ny, selling their clothes (Quiksilver) and that was because my english level was better so I knew it was time to move to Hawaii. I was at that point more spiritual oriented, however ( and I can see all that clearly now) I was feeling lonely, in need of somebody to love me... I was offered by Quiksilver to be transfered to Honolulu and I accepted...3 weeks prior to move there I meeted my W, so....I decided to give it a try.... And it was a great try, but a try that made me look for ways to make a lot of money so I could one day buy a house in Hawaii and live in between Hawaii and Ny (ny only because my W its from here...) Time started to pass and I started to grow resentments due to my W not wanting to move upstate NY or to the beach in Ny ( i needed a place with nature) so basically that started many of our problems and untill recently I couldnt find the reason...
We went to Hawaii last year..... And it was the nicest time in my life, however my W hated that all I liked to do was hinking, biking, swimming and surfing... She wanted to spend time in coffee places writing plays... So I told her, great while you do that I will go surfing and relax, she never told me that was wrong with her so I did it without feeling guilty.
Then all the sadness and pittyness and bad feelings I had they were released in that time in Hawaii so at that point I knew for sure Hawaii was my place (at least for a while)
There are many places all over the world even in America, but I want to try Hawaii. Hawaii its just at this point what I feel, whats calling me. I found a very nice apartment 15mins away from Waikiki beach, and I have a job offer to work with 2 surf companies there. I am planning to start taking classes in college there to go and pursue my career which is Nursing. So far I saw there is a big demand for nurses overthere.
I was forced in my life to move numerous times so I am not scared to start over, specially since in 7 years I havent keep any friends in NY, I am by myself here anyway. I dont know whats gonna happen with this movement, all I know its that I wasnt honest with myself and I feel me not leaving NY at the time planned made me becoming angry at everything around.
I will work as a waiter, dishwasher or whatever while I go to college, I dont mind that, however in NY those are the jobs I had been doing and it wasnt a problem.
I need to wake up everyday and hear the ocean, see the sun and see an horizon line, bike to my job and to college and feel relax....I know I can do those things there, its not always gonna be easy but how can I say no to the idea of walking at night in the beach?
I will be developing my more spiritual side and see what life brings, and I am sure it will work
When the student its ready, the teacher will appear... Even after all this time the sun never says to the Earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that,It lights the whole sky.
Oh by the way I already signed with a biking club in Hawaii so I can meet people that likes to go road biking ( I am good at cycling and I will take my bike with me )
When the student its ready, the teacher will appear... Even after all this time the sun never says to the Earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that,It lights the whole sky.
