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I did get a renter for the guest house. He is a building contractor, and too young for me. But he was the person who I connected with as the "right" person to share my home with.

I figured it would be good to have someone else in the house. I was thinking my predictable schedule was leaving me open to problems. My tenant will move in tonight, and my X got everything out but his tools.

And of course some extra money to pad against the tendency of houses to suck up cash won't hurt.

I hope everyone has a nice weekend.


Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32
D final 9/12
Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
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Today my X came over for his tools. And somehow I ended up helping him. And I came home and was feeling beat up emotionally. And just found it funny that I had to remind him to take his shoes he keeps by the back door, and so on. I drove his truck over and back, he has a new car, he plans to sell the truck. He offered me a cut if I sold it for him. Because that is what I do, all the people dealing with stuff.

And funny, he told me about how I am "Larger Than Life" and how that intimidates people. I just don't know what to say. I am me. I am who I am. For pity sakes I just want to live in a world where people have enough confidence in themselves to stand beside me and just accept me for who I am.

Yes, I have a big personality. I love everyone and everything around me. Even if I don't start conversations with perfect strangers, they start them with me. One of my customers told me I have a gift. That was a nice thing to hear.

I am grumpy because I shouldn't have lifted and carried stuff today. I have stupid adhesions from my hysterectomy and it hurts like crazy right now. But my X has a messed up back and I didn't want him hurting himself. And I know we are divorced, but this past 35 years of always thinking about him is a hard habit to break.

I moved heaven and earth to refinance this house in my name. But am thinking (again) I should sell it and move to Nevada City. That town is chock full of people with big personalities. I think I might be boring and normal there. Or at least people wouldn't be so intimidated by me.

I was thinking back and was remembering my great-grandma. She married her 3rd husband when she was 59. He was 49. Together they opened a nursing home when she was 70. They ran it until she was 95. When she was 96 my Grandpa Rossie passed away. We had visited them 2 weeks before, and Ross was still driving a car at 86.

I am about to turn 55. And I need to remind myself, there is a whole bunch of living left for me to do! And yes, I hope there is a Mr. Right out there for me.

Oh well. Tomorrow is another day!


Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32
D final 9/12
Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
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Yes, we all need a partner who is an equal.


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
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Age doesnt mean too much Wen. My grandfather had my uncle at 62. Last month a judge that i worked with married at 65 after being single for 11 years. He was a widowed. He is as happy as can be. My nieghbors opened a coffee shop at 83. Unfortunately and sadly the both died last year. Do what you want and have at it.


M 53
D 20
Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24
Together 26 yrs
Married 16
W Filed for D 7/21/11
Served 9/6/11
D final 8/28/12

“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”

John Wooden





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Hope you feel better soon. Old habits are hard to break. So what might tip the scale so that you would move?


Me:45, W:45
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M:22, T:25
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Putting finances in order for "D"
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I figure I need to get a year under my belt as a homeowner and then think about what to do next.

I am going around the house and finding all sort of weirdness left behind by my X. Like his flip-flops by the back door that I reminded him to take. He took the nice gray towels I bought, but left behind the matching bath mat. He grumbled a lot about having to buy all his own food. And for a minute I felt bad because I didn't send him off with half the food in the cupboard.

Then I realized he was the one who wanted this. And he is just getting what he wanted. And I will no longer be to blame for all his bad food choices.

The funniest thing my X did was take 3 nice extension cords. He left me 2 longs ones, which have been mended about 20 times. He said I will need those extension cord for when I trim the hedges. I suppose I will go buy a new rechargeable hedge trimmer. Because, as the saying goes, and my X has proved, "It is not if you cut the cord, but when."

HA HA! Funny and appropriate. I feel like my X and I had the worlds longest, most drawn out parting of the ways. I was pointedly not invited to go sailing this weekend. Which is good, because I just need to not hang out with him.

He is headed out to the mainland to visit OW. He tried to tell me he was going to visit our oldest son. No, he is going to visit OW for 9 days. And in the middle of that visit he plans to go visit our son for 2 days.

Anyway, it is not my problem, and of course he is going to visit her. It is part of the break-up to make-up game she and he play. What sense is there in having huge drama if you don't get to have make-up sex?

Not that I would know about that, because I have never had make-up sex, because I'm not a big fighter.

Something to put on my bucket list? Okay, not!


Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32
D final 9/12
Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 9,676
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You are so funny when you just write! (no angst, no filter, just being you)


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
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Hahaha -
Wen, I am just imagining your ex being pissy with OW, since she is the cause of him having to finally move out of his comfy home. And she is the cause of him having to buy new food for his new kitchen. And she is probably going to be pushing to come out and live with him now that he is FINALLY free (which, obviously, has not been a priority for him or he would have finished living with you a LONG time ago).

Just can't help but think that with all obstacles to being with OW now removed, and you with a nice younger man contractor renting the guest house.......well, let's just say I'm picturing a decidedly uncomfortable week for your ex.

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I bet he came and got his stuff just he could look at the guy moving into the guest house! Yet, he forgot some stuff...just another reason to come back by.

kat


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S24, S21, D18, D17
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The guy who rented the guest house actually met my X about two weeks ago, when I showed the prospective renter the guest house and the pool and the laundry room I will be sharing with him.

I didn't want to say anything, but my new tenant is shockingly good looking. And has the most amazing blue-green eyes I have ever seen. Probably what sold him as a tenant.......

I had a long day, they were doing asbestos removal on the outside of the building, so they had rerouted the AC and sealed off part of the building. It smelled like the funny smell you get when you turn the heater on the first time when it gets cold.

We all had headaches and I was nauseous all day. Then I had a meeting directly after work, quilt guild. Tomorrow night I get to see Bob Dylan. That should be interesting!


Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32
D final 9/12
Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
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