Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 2 of 11 1 2 3 4 10 11
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
L
Lost! Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
@anotherstander.

I appreciate all the advice. I'm focusing more on me and my daughter now. I need to take care of me and worry less about what I've no control over. W told me her relationship with OM will probably end soon, but she think there's something better than us out there. She says things just to get me upset and to leave her alone so she can F around some more. Only God knows the outcome of all this, but today I know I'm more important and deserve to be happy. I'll enjoy myself and take care of my daughter. I'm planning to take her to Disney world next month. This whole thing started in early December, so 3month into her mess. She think she's in control of me and OM and will stop whenever she choses. Time wait for no one. So my life should go on with or without her. Sorry about your situation. I'm praying for everyone going through this headache and disappointment.

Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
L
Lost! Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
@anotherstander.

I appreciate all the advice. I'm focusing more on me and my daughter now. I need to take care of me and worry less about what I've no control over. W told me her relationship with OM will probably end soon, but she think there's something better than us out there. She says things just to get me upset and to leave her alone so she can F around some more. Only God knows the outcome of all this, but today I know I'm more important and deserve to be happy. I'll enjoy myself and take care of my daughter. I'm planning to take her to Disney world next month. This whole thing started in early December, so 3month into her mess. She think she's in control of me and OM and will stop whenever she choses. Time wait for no one. So my life should go on with or without her. Sorry about your situation. I'm praying for everyone going through this headache and disappointment.

Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 1,033
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 1,033
Lost!,

You sound like you are in a much better place now....Definitely not in Bora Bora, but better in light of the situation.

Time is your friend...Use it wisely.

Have you been able to see your daughter since early January?


"Be the changes you want to see in the world"
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 58
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 58
Quote:
I appreciate the advice man. I feel you pain man. I honestly don't know why you give so much and most female nowadays still step out and hurt the supposed to be most important person in there lives. So you guys still live together? How's that going for you? I know that must be very difficult.


There are ups and downs.. I know we all are in different places here and stages of dealing and learning in our situations. I take comfort here. I, we, are not alone here. Times where I think people don't understand what this is like, I know here, they do. My thing is, we are not alone in this. For me, there a times, where it feels like I have to shoulder it all, but I don't.


Me:36
Her:35
together 11yrs
M 7 1/2yrs
lived together 10yrs
2dogs 2cats
Mortgage on a house

bomb dropped 01/12/14
Separate bedrooms/W stays here some nights
I want to stay married



Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,511
Likes: 1
2
Member
Offline
Member
2
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,511
Likes: 1
Originally Posted By: Lost!
@floydman

Thanks man. I'm not giving up but loosing up gradually. Very difficult for me to deal with the affair. Knowing my wife is F another man multiple times a week is hard to swallow. Three month and affair still continue with OM.


3 months is not long, unless you are in great pain, and I know you are. But try to get the big picture here.

And may I recommend a movie for you to watch? I hesitate b/c I don't want you to get the "wrong" message from it, b/c it could mean false hope.

But then, it also has other messages AND shows divorce from a kids' perspective (not so clean and tidy).

Anyhow, it's VERY well written, like clearly someone who has DB'd wrote the script.

IT's called "Stuck in Love" with Greg Kinnear, Jennifer Connolly, and a great cast.
Also shows things from the kids view point.


M: 57 H: 60
M: 35 yrs
S30,D28,D19
H off to Alaska 2006
Recon 7/07- 8/08
*2016*
X = "ALASKA 2.0"
GROUND HOG DAY
I File D 10/16
OW
DIV 2/26/2018
X marries OW 5/2016

= CLOSURE 4 ME
Embrace the Change
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
L
Lost! Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
Bora bora lol! I'm doing better brother. I'm Working hard to take care of me and my daughter. My primary focus now is my daughter and me. She's in a full relationship affair and nothing can stop her for now. I've accepted that and moving forward with my life. My peace of mind and sanity is more important.

Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
L
Lost! Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
Wow. Great movie indeed. I saw the movie early this morning. I guess there's always hope if you ready to put the work. I'm in pain but doing everything in my power not to allow her relationship affair affect me. My primary focus now is my daughter and my carrier. She only call if she need something. I'm too smart for her games now. I only do things that benefit my daughter and not her and OM. She makes enough money now to take care of her self and her young lover. Thanks for sharing the movie.

Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
L
Lost! Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
Just finished reading your story man. Wow! Jaw dropping brother. I'm so sorry that you're going through all this. Having a affair is one thing but carrying OM baby is taking it to another level. Do you think her family knows about the pregnancy? What about OM?

Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 12,602
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 12,602
Alot of generalities in your statements.

There are many situations on here who have had affairs in them and were reconciled. The outcome is basically up to you and if you're willing to put the time and effort into it.


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
L
Lost! Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 212
I'm doing just that mrbond. Not easy but my main focus now is my daughter and I. She's young and don't deserve to be part of this mess. I last spoke to w on Tuesday and we made arrangement for her to call me 7pm everyday so I can speak to my daughter. That only lasted for one day before her throwing OM name in my face again. I don't have time for her nonsense anymore. "I don't see any longevity with this guy but I think there's something better than all this out there for me" I told her good luck and hang up the phone. I now know my worth and will not take anymore insult from her or anyone again. We can have the discussion regarding our marriage when she come back to her senses, and if not, life goes on.

Page 2 of 11 1 2 3 4 10 11

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard