Two Roads Diverged In a Yellow Wood... Part 2

[chasingpavements]

The Road Not Taken


Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth; 5

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

-Robert Frost

[chasingpavements]

Here is the link to my previous thread:

[url= http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2371178&page=3][/url]


Here's a quick update,

I went for my job interview for the painting position yesterday. I rocked the interview and felt really good coming out of it. H drove me to the interview and afterwards our whole family headed to the beach. We spent the whole day at the beach and it was so nice to do something together as a whole family, as we haven't done that in quite a while. This summer we haven't planned any vacations as a family since everything has been so up in the air.

I didn't end up getting the job, as they ended up hiring someone who was available to work full time, bummer. I was pretty disappointed by this news, especially as it means that I will have to return to my old (full time) office job, that is full time. So it no longer makes sense for me to stay at home with my son every other day

[chasingpavements]

Ok, hopefully this works this time! Here's my old thread,

Two Roads Diverged In a Yellow Wood

[Not Quitting]

Sorry to hear about the job. Glad you had a great family day though.

[chasingpavements]

I was quite upset about the job, I did great in the interview and felt really confident. But they found someone that could contribute full time hours. I figured that if I were to work full-time I may as well go back to my old job that pays significantly more. I'm going to see if there are any similar jobs that are hiring, but there doesn't seem to be many.

[Not Quitting]

I hear you CP. I'm trying to find something similar to what I'm doing but paying more. There's a lot of competition for what is available and my age seems to go against me although no employer will admit that.

Keep looking. Something will come up, probably when you least expect it.

[chasingpavements]

We did have a nice time at the beach with the family, and it think it's good that we were able to do that. Ever since we've been in this 'limbo' H has been so awkward around me, like he doesn't know how he should be acting around me.

But for the past week and a bit he has lightened up. We've started watching Breaking Bad together on the couch most evenings, so I guess he is not afraid to be around me anymore! haha. For a while he seemed desperate to leave the house and get out for walks or work in the basement. Why is he so afraid of me! I am 14 inches shorter than him and petite! haha. I am the least intimidating person you would ever meet!

I know people say to not be 'waiting' while all of this is going on, yet it is SO hard to not feel that way. We really don't know if we are going to continue on together or separate. I keep thinking awful thoughts like that I should ask him to fix things around the house 'before he decides to leave'. I am not sure how to stop thinking that way. I guess I am just being realistic.

I suppose I don't need to focus on putting a label on our status right now, but the longer this goes on, the more I feel like I would like to know for my own well-being. I guess that's where my own personal boundary comes in with how long we are able to go on how we are, without knowing.

Another thing is that things seem to be improving between us. For months H was distant and cold and now he is opening up to me. Baby steps I guess! It is so much easier now with H acting nicer to me around the house. I thought I was going to go crazy before!

Have a great week everyone, thanks for your support!

-cp

[chasingpavements]

Thanks Not Quitting. My hope is that I can get a different job that will be beneficial for both me and my family. Although if I don't find one soon I'll be stuck going back to my old one, as money is tight. Time to get on this job search!!!

[ForeverYoung]

I suppose I don't need to focus on putting a label on our status right now, but the longer this goes on, the more I feel like I would like to know for my own well-being. I guess that's where my own personal boundary comes in with how long we are able to go on how we are, without knowing.

Here's the thing with that "wanting to know the outcome" thing, cp. H doesn't know himself so how can you! So, you have to find a way to be content with the reality of where you guys are right now. Make any changes you can to get there. And remember to continue to stay away from those relationship talks/temperature checks!

Another thing is that things seem to be improving between us. For months H was distant and cold and now he is opening up to me. Baby steps I guess! It is so much easier now with H acting nicer to me around the house. I thought I was going to go crazy before!

What's his eye contact with you like? For us, W's eye contact (or lack of it) pretty much tells me where she's at.

[Not Quitting]

Thanks Not Quitting. My hope is that I can get a different job that will be beneficial for both me and my family. Although if I don't find one soon I'll be stuck going back to my old one, as money is tight. Time to get on this job search!!!

So you go back to the old job and you keep looking. Nothing says you have to stay there once you go back. And remember, it is said that it is easier to get a job when you are working than when you're not. I believe it as 3 years ago when I was laid off I had no offers for three months, but after I got and accepted an offer, there were about half a dozen other offers.