This life is more than just a read through

[uRworthy]

Aww, thanks Raine. Back at ya~

[ForeverYoung]

From what I read somewhere recently, Google performs personalized searches based on your computers history. Someone on another computer will not get exactly the same result as you. IE your posts came up because that's what you look at. IDN.

Using the same name here as you do in other area's of your life is not a good idea if you'd like to remain anonymous.

If someone knows you're posting here, changing your name won't prevent them from finding your posts if they're really set on doing so.

I like to try to post as if W may see it some day. Heck, maybe she's following along right now. Hi honey, I'm here because I think you're special and you mean a lot to me!

[reachingHigher]

FY, that's the sweetest

[TSquared2]

Hi TDF...please listen to what Snodderly wrote to you...this is your journey now...let her file, see what happens. There are recent sitches here that have gone right up to the D line (rH), and some not. Main thing, protect yourself, lose the emotions when dealing with the possible D...its pure business at that point.

Focus on you and the kids...leave her be.

uR and Raine, your humor, and that of others here have saved me, and re-kindled the dying ember of my old fun self and fanned it back into a raging fire (of the good kind).

RL--humor...the best medicine for the soul I think sometimes...

[TSquared2]

That is great fY! I'm going to steal it...

FTR, anyone can hijack my threads, no worries, I'm easy, lol.

"Heck, maybe she's following along right now. Hi honey, I'm here because I think you're special and you mean a lot to me!"

[Raine]

If you want to turn off google's personalized web search, add

&pws=0

to the end of the URL after you have done your search and hit enter to go to that url and it search again without the personalization. It will look something like this:

https://www.google.com/search?q=divorce+busting&pws=0

[ForeverYoung]

RH: You had somebody snoopin' on your posts. I was afraid we were going to lose you for a bit, or that you wouldn't be able to really post much. What ever happened with that?

Obviously it didn't sabotage your efforts to DB, since nowadays you make Hubby, ummm, late for work.

[reachingHigher]

Yes, it was someone pretty close too and I felt it was very damaging to the R I have with this person.

But I sorta felt like eventually that the value I get from this site overrides the problem with this person. H & I have talked to the person together and begged them to stay away, explaining it was an important outlet for me.

H has never been interested in my emails or much of my communications with others ever. He musta seen this site come up and he has a way of trying to look at my iPhone or iPad while not leaving his open for view. I think he just wants to see what I'm up to in general, but doesn't need details. Details bore him.

IMO, it all depends on the person. I can see the revelation of details on this site destroying one person and encouraging another.

In my case, I try to limit any posts about anything having to do with that person and also try to limit fun and interesting details about some subjects. (Such as how short the skirt was or how high the heels, lol!!)

[ForeverYoung]

H & I have talked to the person together and begged them to stay away, explaining it was an important outlet for me.

Wait... So h knows you post here? When did he learn of this?

H has never been interested in my emails or much of my communications with others ever.

Pre-crises, I used to post on car and bicycle forums, and it would bug W. "Who are you talking to", "what's so important". Looking back, she obviously felt cheated that I was spending time on others and not her. I really did mess up by not correcting that at the time.

Now, she shows no interest in my activities. I guess cause she's done.

I never snoop at her stuff.

In my case, I try to limit any posts about anything having to do with that person and also try to limit fun and interesting details about some subjects. (Such as how short the skirt was or how high the heels, lol!!)

OMG, I can see I'll never live that one down!

[reachingHigher]

I forget how H found out. I might have told him. He was amazed at how well I was taking everything and handling it last year. I really wasn't, but he wasn't living here so I only showed him my best side.

At some point, maybe when I asked him for the money for a DB coach, I told him I was posting on what I call "divorce support" forum. Sometimes I've even mentioned things that happen to people here....like one time I mentioned, during a family supper, that Labug homeschools her two sons and the one in college made dean's list.

Or I said about T^2 living somewhere in the Rockies, and was like an engineer type person. Our family took a vacation up in Colorado one year and did some hiking in RMNP, so I felt that was interesting that I had a cyber friend somewhere over there.

I explained clearly that the forum isn't designed for people to meet each other to form new R's with one another, but only to support and foster their M R.

So the whole family knows I'm on it. Sometimes privately to H, I'll mention something about a couple here and their interaction (or lack thereof). So it's an accepted topic in our household. I explained its cyber friends and people are drawn together for mutual support and advice.

H doesn't seem interested in what I post. But he does like that it obviously has helped me become a better mate and more understanding of his new ways, during MLC and post-MLC.