T2 when it rains it pours. My W somehow got onto my laptop at home and read several of my threads. She absolutely hates my guts and stated she has filed. UGH. Long night
I have not been served. Actually when I pushed back last night and said I would take care of the papers and what was her L's name she absolutely refused. She said I will file. I will take care of it. I said no that I will get the process going and she pushed back. No I haven't seen any papers. She said it takes 2 weeks. When they are ready she will ask for my L's name
Hmmm, well, you could either wait out the 2 weeks and see if she is bluffing OR RE-ACTING...
Or, you could go file yourself and have your L expedite things, and call her out, see what she is really about.
You can always put the process on hold if she is bluffing or RE-acting out of anger and such.
I would still see a L ASAP and get your ducks and defenses lined up.
Maybe others will chime in who have better experience than I, because in my sitch, W had second thoughts, so I held off until this fall per her request.
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
Not much going on that is different, so not much to update.
Realized last night that is only been a couple months since our "anniversary D talk", but seems much longer ago.
W got the job, it was interesting that she was ambivalent about it, happy, but not...maybe it is just the change, and a true step out from being a SAHM, or maybe that she will lose the "freedom" of being a volunteer who can just not go in that day, idk...won't unless/until she talks about it. Of course I congratulated her and all very enthusiastically.
School starts in 3 weeks, no signs of W's imminent departure or any words yet as to stay or go...big steps for the kids entering middle school and high school each...they are nervous, but excited.
S1 texted me last night from fire to make sure I was okay, he had a nightmare where I got some illness or something and died the next day, tore up his sleep...odd.
I am feeling sorta like a broken record, "3rd verse same as the 1st"...lol.
Eh, whatever, September is re-eval month, and 2 years from BD#1 anniversary, this week is 2 years from when she created her first online adult profile (of many)... I note these in passing, because I am not really all that bothered, not much emotional reaction going on...sort of like remembering a long lost friend...yes, it happened, but it has passed. I guess this is what "letting go" of those things feels like. And I ponder the changes, the growth, the journey of all this.
The self help books about her space include the gamut...recovering from guilt, fixing broken relationships, "conscious" loving, menopause, money issues, etc...I haven't looked into them, just at the titles...but some are ones I have read, that we have had around for years, before mlc even. A couple are mine actually. So, just yet another observation... lol
My stand is still unchanged...if she wants to stay and work on a new R, I will give it my all, and I still believe in that it can be great, and that she can work this stuff out, that we can be a great couple again. If she doesn't, I won't fight it anymore, and file to give her her D, and move forward and/or on.
As always, comments, thoughts etc welcome...
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
"There is no "guess", there is do, or, do not." --some green Jedi dude.
PON, you choose, and do not second guess yourself once you choose, okay? Makes life much more anxiety ridden if you second guess and go back on yourself. And yes, what's 2 weeks...
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
I will say though, that I have changed in a big way for me (and it is a "me", not the sitch, kinda change).
When I was hiking, I was rather talkative to the park ranger, some other hikers, etc...just really open and "me"...before I would be kind of reserved. And made some new friends or acquaintances, getting some practice at being just "open", "real" me and being okay with whatever response I get. Now I find I will talk with, approach just about any one...so making some progress there with myself.
I guess after the rejection and such of BD and this whole, drawn out sitch, I have grown to not be afraid of it anymore, I mean, I have been through the worst rejection I can imagine (maybe parental rejection would be worse, not sure). Funny thing is, most of the time people like me (as far as I can tell).
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
lmao Wonka! Oh my.... thing is, I live in a part of the western US that people are pretty blunt and to the point...kinda like NY'ers, but slower in delivery...
"Son, there just ain't something "right" about you...I reckon it's those goggles...yup, the goggles"
You crack me up Wonka!
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
They just don't know how to bring it up! 