stronger - you are my kind of lady - i am pinning this one up on my wall - your last 2 posts - i don't even know what to write here - need to read them a few more times to digest it all
this blanket is making us into some tough chicks and I LOVE IT!!!!!
that distanced/pursuer dynamic - i know, i know - same thing here. and i'm plumb sick of it! don't' want that mouse game anymore, can't bloody stand it!
R on life support
what a great way to put it!!
i got to go take a break and come back and read this agin - don't know why but it blood spoke to me!!
me 46 H 38 M10yrs T 11 S10 BD ow 8/11 h filed 9/25/12
"if i could define enlightenment briefly, i would say it is the quiet acceptance of what is"
Me-31 H-24 D3,D2 M 4 yrs WAW(me) 12/2011 role reversal 03/2012 (H)PA 3-6/2012 (H)D filed 6/2012 D deemed "inactive", closed 8/2012 I've moved on 9/2012
Heard a song this morning that took me back to the good ol days, and sadness crept in. I allowed myself to lean in to it, feel it and understand it.
I believe that it was the loss of a dream, of something treasured. I took out a pic of h and I and really looked at it.
I'm not sure where that happy full of life man went, or that great r. What I do know is that while I treasure those memories, that aspect of our lives is dead. I closed my eyes and sent him love; more tears followed.
I put the picture away and wiped my eyes. I know that I will feel that love again some day. As in love with him that I still am, I don't even know if I could trust him with my heart again. The man that my heart holds onto faded away years ago. He's not that man anymore.
I am so proud of my ability to let emotions wash over me, where not too long ago I was drowning in them. Maybe I needed that cry, just to let things go. I'm also proud of my gained emotional stability and the ability to gently move back into a state of peace.
Me-31 H-24 D3,D2 M 4 yrs WAW(me) 12/2011 role reversal 03/2012 (H)PA 3-6/2012 (H)D filed 6/2012 D deemed "inactive", closed 8/2012 I've moved on 9/2012
That was a beautiful post, as I read I smiled and got tears in my eyes. Beautiful way to express, I struggle with all of my emotions and the fear of sitting with them. This is something I need to work on, thanks for sharing, it is a great idea and I just might copy it to give myself that little push.
M 43 H 43 M 21 T 24 Bomb 9/2011 EA 9/2011 H moved out 10/2011 I filed for D out of anger 2/2012 H moved in with OW 3/2012 focused on blame and bitterness 9/2011-6/2012 found DB 7/2012
Wow stronger, that post brought tears to my eyes as well. What a beautiful moment you had, despite the bittersweetness of it all.
I think I am starting to understand much more the idea of owning our emotions instead of them owning us. And I see it so much in your post.
(((())))
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
Yes kd, good reminder. Just as I am capable of growth and change, so is he.
Acceptance, love and forgiveness really are beautiful gifts, aren't they?
Thank you friend
Me-31 H-24 D3,D2 M 4 yrs WAW(me) 12/2011 role reversal 03/2012 (H)PA 3-6/2012 (H)D filed 6/2012 D deemed "inactive", closed 8/2012 I've moved on 9/2012
Just bringing this here for my answer. I know you were having a bit of fun. It is a reality for people, especially with young kids...
Originally Posted By: strongerthanever
So as you can see I live off of 3-4 hours of sleep a day during my week with them, which is cool, bc it's only for a week at a time. However, H is going out of state during his week, so I get my babies for 3 weeks in a row starting today (my week, his week, my week).
I'm really excited about our time together, yet anxious over sleep deprivation. Ahhh!
While not real healthy, just understand that this is a temporary sitch / time in your life.
It may drag you down and bag you, but people are able to do this for periods of time and survive... mostly...
Just keep yourself as healthy as possible, otherwise...
Me-31 H-24 D3,D2 M 4 yrs WAW(me) 12/2011 role reversal 03/2012 (H)PA 3-6/2012 (H)D filed 6/2012 D deemed "inactive", closed 8/2012 I've moved on 9/2012
