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He went to sleep at someone else's house tonight I guess. He left his laptop open so I read his latest Facebook message, which was to his best friend. He said things have gotten bad again and now we are just working on moving on and dividing our possessions (since when?? He's just selling them.)

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I'm going out with some friends today. I'm looking forward to it.

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Other than getting a life and not pursuing, I don't feel like I've made any other changes yet. I've been trying to smile more and be more upbeat, but I feel like he has not noticed.

What other behavioral changes should I be making?

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Like this morning. I was in the kitchen getting breakfast. He woke up and started walking past me without saying anything or looking at me so I said good morning! and he just said hi and went into the bathroom.

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Also, should I even start to try to engage him in conversation?

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No, but exchanging pleasantries like, "good morning" is just being polite. He's noticing. He's just trying to justify his position that he should leave the M.

Keep doing what you're doing. It took a while to get where you are today. It will take time to get back.


M:63
H:53
S:41, SS:28, SS:25, SD:23
M:15
T:16

Bomb:12/17/11, "I think we should go our separate ways."
H moves to his mother's house, 4/1/12
12/21/12: H moves back home, piecing

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I agree with scaredsilly! Keep being kind and he will notice. If things have been bad for a while he may not trust it. Consistency on your part. You can't control him. Now if I could only take my own advice:-)


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
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Thanks, guys. I think that he thinks I'm just being resentful by not pursuing or talking to him. He was always so concerned that I'd "hate" him for doing this and I think he thinks that I'm trying to show him that I hate him.

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... Like, I'm wondering if he thinks that I wouldn't be interested in talking to him or even if he changed his mind, he wouldn't try to speak to me about because he feels I don't want to talk to him, since I haven't.

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Originally Posted By: sophiedaphne
Thanks, guys. I think that he thinks I'm just being resentful by not pursuing or talking to him. He was always so concerned that I'd "hate" him for doing this and I think he thinks that I'm trying to show him that I hate him.


he's upset because you are NOT being a bee-otch about it! LOL! it doesn't fit with his preconceived picture of your reactions to his plan.

just keep doing what you're doing. do it for yourself. show YOURSELF you can control your emotions and not react to his anger. do it to be a better YOU!

and as you were advised several times before, get out of his head.


M:63
H:53
S:41, SS:28, SS:25, SD:23
M:15
T:16

Bomb:12/17/11, "I think we should go our separate ways."
H moves to his mother's house, 4/1/12
12/21/12: H moves back home, piecing

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