I try and remember that each one of us have free will. We can choose to do good or otherwise. Any one of us can be impacted negatively by others poor choices regardless of the positive choices we make each day.
It goes back to what we can control and what we can't. My relationship with God is not based upon the choices of others and IMO, I won't hold God accountable for when others make choices that I feel are not what God would prefer.
I like your perspective here CES^^^.
Hope you are having a better day Ro. As much as things may seem to suck I do see a lot of positives in your sitch. What can you do to focus on those more instead of the negative feelings you are having? What you focus on expands right?
Sorry, Ro, hope you're feeling better. These things wear on us emotionally, physically & spiritually.
A perspective I try and keep and feel free to take it or leave it but I try and remember that each one of us have free will. We can choose to do good or otherwise. Any one of us can be impacted negatively by others poor choices regardless of the positive choices we make each day.
It goes back to what we can control and what we can't. My relationship with God is not based upon the choices of others and IMO, I won't hold God accountable for when others make choices that I feel are not what God would prefer.
I fully believe God is still there for you and is walking with you. He knows what you're made of and maybe this sitch, as unfortunate as it is, may help you see what you are made of for yourself and how God will see you through.
((Ro))
I totally agree with you. I KNOW God has been with me and has never left my side. How else would I even have the strength to do what I'm doing?
Sometimes I just feel like God is thinking I'm must stronger than I actually am. I do want to scream out Why can't my life be easier? There's a reason for everything...including what I'm going through. I know I'll come out greater and better on the other side, but going through it is not easy for me. But in the words of Israel and New Breed...I'm moving, moving, forward...
Thanks for your words of encouragement. It reall means alot.
I try and remember that each one of us have free will. We can choose to do good or otherwise. Any one of us can be impacted negatively by others poor choices regardless of the positive choices we make each day.
It goes back to what we can control and what we can't. My relationship with God is not based upon the choices of others and IMO, I won't hold God accountable for when others make choices that I feel are not what God would prefer.
I like your perspective here CES^^^.
Hope you are having a better day Ro. As much as things may seem to suck I do see a lot of positives in your sitch. What can you do to focus on those more instead of the negative feelings you are having? What you focus on expands right?
I have a hard time seeing positives when they are not the positives I WANT to see. LOL
You are right. I need to focus on the positive things that are happening right now. Someone smart (nhmom I believe) told me to start a gratitude list. I'm beginning to think I'm going to need more than one list.
Saga from yesterday: I went off on H over the phone about his A yesterday, when I should have just kept my mouth shut. I was having severe back pain, and I was in a FOUL mood. I knew I shouldn't have said anything, and ended the conversation by saying,"Never mind, just forget I said anything. I know this is something I have to deal with on my own."
By the time I got home, he was asleep on the couch (or pretending to be sleep). This is one of his tactics whenever we usually argue. I just dropped my stuff off in the kitchen and headed to lay down myself. Took a quick nap, but didn't really rest because of my back.
And here's where I start looking at him like he has 2 heads, or as I like to call it - "the side eye". i got up from my nap, and we actually ended up hanging out a bit and watching some TV together (Kevin Hart on Modern Family...HILARIOUS!) He's offering to give me a back massage or go grab me some dinner. We both want to see "The Avengers" this weekend, but of course I have to see all of the individual movies first. LOL I haven't seen "Thor", so he searches on Netflix, OnDemand, etc. to see if he can find it. Figures out Red Box has it. I say okay, I'll go by there tomorrow.
This morning, he asked if I have any cash. I say no, but I need to go to the bank today anyway. He says he can run to the store before work (which will make him late). I tell him it's up to him. He comes back with cash, AND the movie "Thor". I said Oh wow, thank you!"
I do KINDA feel bad that I chewed him out yesterday. It was like I couldn't stop myself. I think deep down I'm REALLY annoyed and angry at him for being so nice, helpful, etc. He wants to leave, so why do all of this stuff? It confuses me. DETACH, DETACH, DETACH!
Need to work on just being quiet a lot more. And remembering that I can only control ME.
H may be doing nice things because he's sincere... maybe it's guilt.. the reasons may never be revealed. analyzing and trying to figure him out will only drive you crazy.
love is a choice. given the situation.. what do you choose to do?
you are an amazingly strong, beautiful woman. i don't even need to see a picture to know that. focus on yourself. and try not to worry about what he's doing.
(((( ))))
Me:38.. H:33. Two beautiful kids S:6 D:3 M:8.. together for 11. Bomb dropped:10/17/11 Separated:11/07/11
H may be doing nice things because he's sincere... maybe it's guilt.. the reasons may never be revealed. analyzing and trying to figure him out will only drive you crazy.
love is a choice. given the situation.. what do you choose to do?
you are an amazingly strong, beautiful woman. i don't even need to see a picture to know that. focus on yourself. and try not to worry about what he's doing.
(((( ))))
BF, thanks for stopping by. I need to stop analyzing (I majored in Computer Science. That's what I do. LOL)
I am choosing to love. I just need to choose it in a detached way. I need to also do a better job of focusing on me. I have always been bad with that!
In other news, apparently H and I are going to the movies together. Either tonight or tomorrow. He hasn't actually asked me, I think he knows I want to see "The Avengers", and assumed we'd go together. Last night, he asked me if I could do 3D movies with my vertigo. I said I wasn't sure. I'd just have to try it.
We haven't gone to the movies together since before the bomb - like December! Stay tuned!
