You know I told my H to be careful what he wished for that it might come true! LOL I really don't think that he thought I would go through with this. I know I am not letting him run all over me in this D. I have grown a pair since all of this started, too bad he didn't!!
Even my S said it felt weird with H here. Awkward. S said he couldn't do it.
LOL, that really made me giggle. Before I would have never thought about going for what is mine. But you know, I don't know what the future holds and I have to be prepared for me and my D. I worked our whole married life except for the last six years. I quit my job when H left back in 2005 because D needed me and was having some major behavioral issues. She didn't uderstand what was going on with her being disabled. I deserve what the court says I can get and the kicker is that they are going to garnish his wages instead of me having to worry about him paying me.
You are doing what needs to be done. It is not about his needs anymore.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
You are so right. I am not worrying about him anymore, just me and D.
He called here a little bit ago. He wanted info on a few things. I told him that he needed to have his L go through my L because the info is there. I told him I would prefer that so things down get misunderstood. It seems like he has come down off his high horse since visiting his L this morning.
He shared with me that he will have to pay CS and probably maintenance. The half of military retirement pay is a given. He was a little upset how much he will have to pay his L. Wait till he finds out my L is asking the judge to have him pay for mine too. It doesn't mean that he will have to pay but it is thrown out there too.
YR, Reality only sinks in w/them when it's money out of pocket to you and your children. They do not like to "share" their funds w/us, but that's the consequences of his actions.
You have done absolutely nothing wrong and believe me, from what I know about you from the board, you've been more than honest and willing to work w/him everything.
I would go ahead and advise him when he comes to see your daughter, that he needs to either take her out for a bit or back to his place. Your home should not be a place for him to make as his permanent visitation site.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I agree with you about "sharing" funds. This D hasn't really even started yet and he is panic mode. I gave it to God to help me make it through this and the judge and my L to get what I need to survive. I will not let him walk over me one more minute and he realises that now.
I have decided that he needs to take D somewhere and not sit here with her. She would enjoy some time with her dad without all of the hoopla!!
My H will be in my life forever because of D but he has killed all the feelings I had for him. He will never be coming home again. His actions have proved that I can't believe a word he says and no longer trust him.
You have always been such a wonderful inspiration to others, your circumstances have changed, but you have not.
The "be careful what you wish for" statement is sooooo true for these ML'ers. They love the chaos they cause, and when you comply with their ridiculous destruction of the family, they are perplexed. There are consequences for their behaviors.....
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I could not agree with you more. Feelings gone, trust gone, money gone, hope gone, respect gone = moving on without Ml'er.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
