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I figured I better start a new thread before Jack got after me! lol

Anyway, H came over today to visit D. My S and his family came over for dinner.

I haven't talked to H since he was served. He was livid that the L is requesting him to pay child support for the rest of his life. He has an appointment with a L in the morning. He told me not to be shocked when I got the response back from his L.

H said that he wanted half of everything. That I was not going to touch his pay from the prison. He told me to go and get a job and I told him I would but he would have to come over every night to watch D while I worked. He didn't agree with it!! LOL

I told him that he is able bodied and has no responsiblities he coud go and get a second job. He didn't like that either! lol

I told him that is why I hired an attorney so he could work out all of the details and not to bother me with his ranting and raving. Let the attorneys handle it.

So I guess the war has begun. I think he is starting to panic and reality is hitting him!!

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Yellowrose, this is his bed, he better bring a comfy pillow. As for what he is or isn't going to do, you need to tell him that he will do what the Judge tells him to do, plain and simple. You are better off not talking to him.

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YR my xh went ballistic when I hired a lawyer LOL. As if I was going to take what he suggested!!

I agree with BH, better not to talk to him imo. I only communicated through lawyers, it cost more, but was worth it. We really don't have to take their anger. My take is always, if you can't be civil do not talk to me. After 5/6 years they should be through anger imo.

They really like to walk away from their responsibilities.

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BH

You are right. I don't have any contact except when he visits D and I make myself scarce. He has gotten smacked in the face with the reality pillow!

I did tell him that I wasn't going to listen to him and that is why I hired a L to handle all of this for me.

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beatrice

He is getting scared IMO. Oh well, he has brought this mess upon himself.

What makes me crazy is he comes over here and acts like everything is okay.....what a jerk! That is why I make myself scarce. I don't stop him from ocming over because I don't want him to say that I stopped him from seeing D to the judge. Honestly I wished he wouldn't come over at all!

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My xh used to do something we called 'pass for normal' which I think is the same - act as if everything was OK, when it so blindingly wasn't - like the roof has fallen in and you sit there drinking coffee out of the best china.. . . . . and acting as if the roof was still there.

when we were selling our house I had to go over and pack stuff up and make sure everything was OK. My xh [still technically married then] used to come by and stay all day long, when my youngest son and I wanted him to just go away. Then he would leave in the evening and go back to the OW. And come over again the next morning . . . .

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beatrice

That is exactly right. Everything is normal in their eyes until we throw a wrench in it!

I talked to my L today and have an appointment with him on Wednesday. I have questions that need to be asked and he wants to answer them. I have a good L, thank God.

I want to see if I can just have H take D somewhere instead of being at the house. I can't be comfortable at my house with him here.

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I think you have every right to ask him to do that YR.



Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet

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Jack

I thought so but I don't want any problems especially the way my H is acting lately!

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Y, I dont think that is an unreasonable request. You have every right to feel comfortable in your home. Too bad for h if he doesnt like it.

he should be careful what he wishes for - it comes with consequences!

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