I found out last week they might close my D's program and my pay might stop because of the budget cuts. That means my D would be at home 24/7. That is not a good thing for her or me for that matter.
My H had the nerve to tell me to go get a job then. I said that I have worked all of our M life and had to quit my job when he had his last episode to make sure that D was taken care of.
I would get a job but who would take care of my D??? What an azzz!
He did go a nd see a L on Friday and started this, "my L said this and that." He hasn't retained an attorney yet and I don't want to listen to his garbage.
My L is going to make sure that me and D will be taken care of. My H wanted the title of one of our vehicles and I tild him "no" and that ticked him off. I am not going to let him run all over me.
I a tired of holding my tongue and I tell him exactly what I think. Enough is enough!
My main priority is my D. I will take care of myself. I think it is about time I do!!
YR I am so very sorry that this is happening to you. Truly after all the mouth zipping there is a time to talk and a time to be silent, and this is when you actually need to say these things, for yourself as well as your h. Some of it does go in.
I no longer have any contact with my xh, but when we have spoken in the past I am surprised how much he took on board. They may, and usually do 'react' to us at the time, but they do go away and process it.
I very much hope the situation with your daughter is resolved. And yes, you definitely need a hug! ((((( :))))))
YR, I found while going through the crisis, that at first, I zipped my mouth and tried to keep the peace in all areas. However, as time moved along, I came to realize that if I didn't step up to the plate and tell my xh what was on my mind, he would have walked all over me and taken everything that we had and would have left me on the street corner, in a tent, w/a tin cup. They are truly selfish individuals during this time.
YR, you've been steady as a rock and have done all that you can do to work things through w/your h. It is now time to focus on you and your daughter and what you need to do to ensure that you both are okay, not just now, but in the future.
Your h is going to learn that it's not as easy as it was the first time around to walk away and that you are one smart lady who has learned a lot and will put that knowledge to work for you and your daughter. In time, he will need to face the consequences of his actions and I'm afraid it's going to be sooner than later. Buckle up and be ready for some rough riding in the MLC car.
Hang in there!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
You know I am okay with everything right now. I have to speak up because I have to protect me and my D!
I too hope the sitch with my D's program gets solved. I have written letters to the Senators, Congressmen, State reps and the Govenor. If the things get cut that they want to be cut it would be a ripple effect. It would cost the state more money because alot of the parents can't handle their children and would put them in group homes or nursing homes. This is ridiculous in my mind!
My H doesn't even know I have filed yet. He should be served later this week or the beginning of next week. I wished I was a fly on the wall because they said they will even go to the prison where he works to serve him.
I know I have done everything possible and I don't feel guilty about anything. My H is a lost soul.
I have grown alot through this whole thing. I am not a pushover by any means and my H knows this. He will suffer the consequences for his actions. I am buckled up and ready for anything that heads my way!!
So good that you are ready to stick up for yourself. Zipping your lip with these people gets tired after awhile because they are so busy looking at their own belly buttons that they forget they were part of a family. Take care of the needs of your daughter and yourself. When he wakes up, he will have to figure it out for himself.
Hugs to you YELLOW. Sorry about the programs. things are changing allll over the country.
You and I both know, the programs, are always the first place they look to make cuts. More than once I have said the legislators should spend one day working with one of these kids. Then MAYBE they would get it. An hour to get dressed, is not unresonable.
Unless someone is in it daily, they just don't get it. They believe the parents should do everything, but they don't realize that it is like having an infant or a toddler FOREVER, and the TV is not a babysitter.
Just frustrating...
Have a good day and enjoy your D's smiles, they do make it worth it
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
