# 73 - Ocean

[MichelleLT]

Hope the nurse is lifting some of the burden from your family.

Hope you have enjoyed your day off, even though you couldn't go away.

I am glad H is starting to see the impacts on the kids. The fact that they are showing those insecurities is a sign they are feeling more stable, loved, and trusting. I know you both can help them work through it.

(((Maria)))

[kat727]

I just wanted to come by and give you a hug.

((((((Kalni))))))

kat

[Kalni]

Hello friends,
things are quiet on this side of the world. Well, not very quiet but at least for me not much is happening. My dad's is coming and going. One day he looks like he is dying and the next he is conversing with us etc.

H is ok. Resting and enjoying home life. We havent yet felt the financial impact of quiting his job and hopefully we wont since his morning boss offered to give him at least half of the money he lost so that he can dedicate himself to the job he has. I believe that in 3 months time, he will be making more money with half the hours he was working before. Maybe I am too optimistic but that is my gut feeling.

Between us, we are peaceful and still fragile. For me it feels as if I am on vacation with all the help I get from him being home. We watch TV together, cook together, go shopping. It's all very new and weird. He plays basket ball twice a week and cut down a LOT in smoking. The kids are ecstatic.They want him more than they want me. But I am fine with that

We had a discussion one of these days when he said that he cant help me deal with his infidelity and that I should be doing that on my own. I didnt back off. Not out of fear or anything else. I got my message through to him. I am beginning to realise I have to accept his timing which is much slower than mine. I am staying true to me. And that feels good.

Sometimes when we snuggle and fall asleep peacfully, I feel like it was all a nightmare.

That's all from Athens
Take care
K

[Butterfly1]

SOrry about your father Kalni - hugs and prayers from here for your entire family!!! (())

[MichelleLT]

So so so so happy that H is being much more active in the family and spending so much time with you and the kids. That is just awesome. I have my fingers crossed that his day job helps cancel out the impact of quitting the other job. But either way, I am sure you guys will be fine.

I am beginning to realise I have to accept his timing which is much slower than mine. I am staying true to me. And that feels good.

Sometimes when we snuggle and fall asleep peacefully, I feel like it was all a nightmare.

It's the little things, but that sounds like amazing progress to me. The R you guys are building seems so much more intimate, so much stronger than before (at least to my outsider's perspective). Not an easy path, nor a quick one, but worthwhile I think.

I am glad your dad is still hanging in there and seems to be "all there" some days. I hope he's not in too much pain. The nurse seems to be working out well I gather, since you aren't complaining about her/him.

(((Maria)))

[flowmom]

Thanks for the update Kalni. Ongoing wishes for peace as your father lives his life out. The togetherness with your H sounds so positive. I believe that there is a huge opportunity for healing under these circumstances. (((Hugs)))

[Generosity]

Thanks for the update K...Peace & quiet is well deserved!

I always believed you could do it...

Sunny

[AliSuddenly]

Hi K,

I'm so sorry about your Dad, it must be so hard I can only imagine..

But its good news that you are settling into a happy homelife again with H, as happy as it can be at a time like this. And thats amazing about his job!! So he was very stressed about quitting last time you posted, now that he has this raise, is he feeling better? More confident, happier in his decision? He ought to be, its a brilliant outcome so far.

This bit frankly made me cry...

We watch TV together, cook together, go shopping. It's all very new and weird. He plays basket ball twice a week and cut down a LOT in smoking. The kids are ecstatic.They want him more than they want me. But I am fine with that
...Sometimes when we snuggle and fall asleep peacfully, I feel like it was all a nightmare.

Sounds wonderful, truly a happy ending crystalising (nearly huh).
xx

[pie]

Hi Kalni,

So glad to hear things are going peacefully with you and H, still check on your posts, lurking. Your strength was ver inspiring to me, and I check in everynow and then to get a little 'fix'

H has finally opened up, and seems he went on a few dates and went on holiday with one woman. He says he owes her a holiday now in our country, so i guess its still on.

BUT he is being upfront an honest . Which helped tremendously. He is at the stage where he says he has thought a million times of coming back but is terrified of feeling 'suicidal again'.

I'm feeling strangly disconnected from the H I remember, and feel a bit lighter...

I'm not sure I want R with him.Given this new information about the dating etc. Hes not sure he wants to come back. So i suppose we are at the same spot!!

Anyway, will check in as always....
Pie

[Gypsy]

Hello Specialest of K's..

*hugs* You're wonderful. My heart goes out to you and your family. *hugs*

It's beautiful to hear that you're becoming a family again, slowly, with your husband. That criteria you set are coming to fruition. And it sounds like you're allowing yourself to lean on him.

You are a dear, incredible woman and friend.

*hugs*