Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 9 of 24 1 2 7 8 9 10 11 23 24
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,361
F
fb2 Offline
Member
Offline
Member
F
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,361
Goes back to my point about how much real core values have eroded! I think this is partly why we have so much infidelity and divorce.

Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,424
V
Member
Offline
Member
V
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,424
Perhaps, though I have a feeling that there was just as much infidelity going on before those "core values" eroded. We will never know.

My point was that what was being talked about was not adultery, and for someone to suggest it was was out of line.

And we know there is nothing wrong with BobbiJo's core values!

Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 9,762
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 9,762
Quote:
Goes back to my point about how much real core values have eroded! I think this is partly why we have so much infidelity and divorce.


That's possible. However, there has been plenty of infidelity throughout history, it was just very hush hush and swept under the rug because D was difficult to obtain or in some cases impossible. Think of how many people lived lives of misery, disrespect, and exposure to God know's what because of the secretive atmosphere of the last centuries.

Yes, the US is very prim and proper in so many ways but think of who founded the country! PURITAINS! LOL. We still have the most bass ackward views toward sex I have seen. What was created as a natural, beautiful thing we manage to twist into being shameful. It really is sad.

I was raised Southern Baptist. I still am....doctrinally. I have much more progressive ideas about sex than the church teaches. Now, that could be because I was raised in Southern California, not Georgia where the church's 'rules' were pounded down people's throats with a vengence from the pulpit - I don't know. All I do know is that if we don't start being much more open and honest with our kids from an early (but appropriate) age then they are destined to be as stunted in their views of sexuality as so many of us have been.

Ok....off my soapbox now. I just know what kind of havoc the beliefs I was raised with caused with my own experiences as a teenager. I was convinced that due to one circumstance that I had no control over I was damaged beyond repair and deserved what I got. I would hate for any other girls (or boys) to have that same warped vision to get past as adults. It's nearly impossible!

My son has open dialog with myself and Gabe whenever he feels he needs to talk. Nothing is off the table and he knows it. I may not always be so comfortable with the discussion, but he would NEVER know that!


T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43
bomb12/4/07
PA5/07
S12/26/07
D final 11/17/08
Back together with no defined R 05/2010
confused....to say the least!!!

Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 6,948
B
BobbiJo Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
B
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 6,948
Wow, lots has happened since I left my thread!

Bottom line, I was not promiscuous before I married Dan--he was my first and has been my only sexual partner. So I do not intend to be promiscuous now that I am single again. It just doesn't align with who I am as a person. If others choose to go out and explore and enjoy themselves, that is their decision. I have made mine, and it feels right for me.

That being said, I would like some lighthearted laughs and kissing. I will just take things as they come, no need to stress about it. If a guy wants more than that, sooner than I do, then he is free to go look elsewhere....it's that simple.

Ok, back to work for me. smile


Me-35

Together: 18 yrs
M-12.5 yrs
S-8
D-4
D'd: Feb. 2010

The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save. --Zeph. 3:17
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 5,992
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 5,992
No arguments from me. One should be free to follow their own convictions or code in life.

I dont consider myself or my last girlfriend to be promiscuous. It did not seem to bother her that she had various sexual partners in her life and she was very religious.

Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 2,014
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 2,014
I agree with you BBJ ...and when the time comes for me I will be looking for a guy who feels the same way about it that I do.


Me 54
DS19 and DS17
Married 06/1989
Divorced 01/2011
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 3,135
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 3,135
<<I will just take things as they come, no need to stress about it.>>

pardon the pun...nudge nudge, wink wink, know what i mean know what i mean....

I will wager that if and when the right guy comes along (one that does not make you vomit after kissing) and alcohol is involved and if he pushes the right buttons, your alignment (as a person) may be slightly altered. Anyhow, I am pulling for you as always. Now, I am pulling for you to have fun (however you define that)damn it!!!!

:-)

Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 6,948
B
BobbiJo Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
B
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 6,948
Oh trust me John, I am more than ready for fun!!! And who knows, you are right, I can't say what will happen until it happens. Nice to have a game plan but as we all know, plans can change... All I need is a worthy partner in crime. wink


Me-35

Together: 18 yrs
M-12.5 yrs
S-8
D-4
D'd: Feb. 2010

The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save. --Zeph. 3:17
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,873
I
Member
Offline
Member
I
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,873
I can't have a sexual relationship that's meaningless. I know it's weird coming from a guy but I've never had and never will. It's that line I won't cross unless that someone is special in my heart. Believe me sometimes I wish I could be more normal lol. I'm also not much into dating or 'sampling the buffet' as some of you put it. So clearly I'm doomed to find someone ever again lol


Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6
Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks
Aug 2006, left again
Apr 2007, filed for divorce
Dec 2007, reunited
Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 6,948
B
BobbiJo Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
B
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 6,948
Originally Posted By: ImprovedRomeo
I can't have a sexual relationship that's meaningless. I know it's weird coming from a guy but I've never had and never will. It's that line I won't cross unless that someone is special in my heart. Believe me sometimes I wish I could be more normal lol. I'm also not much into dating or 'sampling the buffet' as some of you put it. So clearly I'm doomed to find someone ever again lol




OK IR, you are one of the guys I am looking for. Glad to know they exist! You will find someone again bc I think there are a lot of us women out there looking for someone who feels the same way we do... smile


Me-35

Together: 18 yrs
M-12.5 yrs
S-8
D-4
D'd: Feb. 2010

The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save. --Zeph. 3:17
Page 9 of 24 1 2 7 8 9 10 11 23 24

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard