Hey FLTC: That is AWESOME!!! Congrats to you. It is a long road back from the depths of despair but I don't know anyone here who hasn't been there. To recover then have the faith to find love again is just wonderful (I should know).
So when is the wedding? And are we all invited? Well, even if it is virtual - that's ok! Or did you already tie the knot? I'm beginning to think about doing the same myself...
Thanks, everyone. Kerry: No BG in my future. No interest in doing the War College. I have gone to formal school for over forty years....I'm done. It's FLTC's time.....new lease on life that I could have only imagined 5 years ago. To go from such depths to great happiness (except the constant pebble in my shoe that IS XW!)was unexpected. My heart still aches for everyone on these pages....mostly left by heartless human beings......Our 4 daughters are off at school, and only my S12 is left home, and he's easy!
November is the big month. Hard to believe we have been together for two years. I had been separated for three years, and a year in Iraq was the "total detachment tool" (Caution: I don't recommend that "therapy" for everyone, but it sure made me get my head out of my as&!)
You are all some great human beings. I wish you nothing but the best! I'll check in now and then. After all, I've resided here for four years!
I have not been here much, but so happy I checked today and learned that you are getting remarried. Best wishes!!!! I wish you and GW a lifetime of happiness!!!!!
Well, with some freE time on my hands, I went back and resurrected the legendary "Christmas 2006 Post" that I have often mentioned. Here it is in it's unvarnished entirety! Totally untouched!
It shows that:
a. some marriages can't be saved and should not be.
b. that the people on this board are just a God send, because look where I was in 2006, and where I am now! Marrying a wonderful woman; buying a new house; two years removed from Iraq! I owe a lot to my current state to the great friends on this board.
I got on my feet in no small part from the support I received here.
I hope that my story, as least as it turned out today, can give you hope that if I can come out of this freak show, taking about 5 different medications, to where I am today, it can happen for anybody!
Hang in there; believe in yourself; throw the WASs under the bus (easy....easy....FIGURATIVELY)!
Without further delay....MY DISFUNCTIONAL CHRISTMAS TALE, 2006:
Can I have a reality check here? It really was what 2T2's post said just the day before.
Fortunately 2T2's post resonated with me yesterday and today, as I lived through two days of mine fields. The plan was to spend Christmas Eve and today w/ W. and kids. She was already angry because I didn't call early enough on the 23rd, and kids already cleaned the house. I was going to offer to clean it on the 24th and had no idea it would be done a day earlier. Went to my old house yesterday at around 9:15 AM. Took Ds to get present for W. Every year, we have had the same couple at our house for dinner. W. puts on a really spectacular spread every year, which requires a lot of planning and preparation. She buys great food and a lot of wine. We begin by having some wine and talking. W. started cooking dinner, and begins to lose her composure and asks if anyone has seen a "microplaner". I had no idea what she was talking about. She starts tearing cabinets apart, slamming stuff. D14 and I start to scramble, but realize we don't know what she wants. It ends up it was a cheese grater (who knew?) Ten minutes later, I ask to help and put cheese I a bowl. I picked the wrong bowl (it wasn't pretty enough). Five minutes later, W. gets upset because she can't find a bread basket. We all start to scramble again. W. goes to the basement to look for basket. Female guest looks at me and said : "You can't do anything right". After dinner, I clean all the dishes and put all the food away with Ds help. W. talks with guests. W. will not talk after guests leave, and starts stomping around.
Christmas morning: I purchased and wrapped all of the kid's stocking stuff, and more than half of the presents. She budgeted for presents,which of course I mostly pay for anyway, but I put a lot of it on my card instead of our common card (who cares?). Got W. $100 gift certificate for makeup and another $100 gift certificate for a liquor store that has great wine. Kids are happy, love their stuff. W. actually says thank you for today.
Afternoon rolls around. S8 is at a friend's, D16 is at a friend's, and D14 is on the computer. W. falls asleep in front of TV. I lay on the other couch near D14 and fall asleep for 10 minutes. W. leaves to visit her mother's grave and comes home in a rage. Said to me:" You're here to visit with the kids, not nap". 10 minutes, mind you. Not 2 hours. Two kids were not even home. I replied "It's just what you did" She replies" I'm not here to visit with the kids". Next landmine: I called my S's friend house saying I'm coming to pick him up. The mom says come and have a glass of wine. I took one of the 12 remaining bottles of wine W. purchased so I didn't show up empty handed. W. loses it again: "How many bottles of wine are you going to drink/take, 10, 20?". I had about one bottle all weekend. Remember I gave her a gift certificate for $100 at a liquor store that very morning. I can't reason with her. I go and return 30 minutes later.
W. starts to yell that the dishes have been out all day and they should have been put away. I did dishes all weekend, because I know I can't cook, and yes, some clean dishes were not put in the cabinet. D14 starts going after W. "Pick your battles. Why don't you just put the dishes away?" I told her to be quiet and back off.
I replied "I'll do it. Why does it need to be on your schedule?" "Because it's my kitchen." I know she did the planning and cooking. I don't just sit around however. All the presents, doing all the dishes, went out with kids to throw the football two times for at least an hour.
She might be stressed because I'm leaving for almost two years, with one being in Iraq, if all goes according to planned, but she's been like this for years. A love lost? Disappointment as a mother? Anger at me for sure for not stepping up with angry D sooner. Not showing up with a case of wine (which she would not like anyway). Maybe not offering to help earlier. Maybe as COG said, she's a caged animal. She be with kids all alone for about two years.
