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As far as my post, do you think by him not addressing her name that I typed that he is deflecting? Or did I guess the wrong girl?


If he's seeing her, he will probably deny it.

If he's not seeing her, he will probably deny it.

What's the point in even asking? He's an unreliable source.

It's like reading "The Onion". It could be amusing, but it's certainly not a reliable source of factual content.

So why are you taking this so seriously?

Last edited by TimeHeals; 09/23/10 12:58 PM.

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Yeah, right now it's all irrelevant. As for the 'seriousness...' well it goes without saying that when you've spent that long with someone and found out all these things after the fact, it does hurt. I think it'd be weird if it didn't cause a little hurt.

Oh well. Over and out. I will be happy when all this saga is over.

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Originally Posted By: soleil
well it goes without saying that when you've spent that long with someone and found out all these things after the fact, it does hurt.


Yeah, I know it hurts. Fact is, if someone other than your once significant other did these things to you, and disrespected you, and cheated and lied to you...you wouldn't put up with it for a second. You'd drop em' like a hot rock. You wouldn't take it personally...they did what they did, and it had NOTHING to do with you. It's the same regardless of who the transgressor is. Just food for thought.

That said...I know how hard it is, and how much it hurts.


"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.
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You are so right, Antlers. If it was anyone else, I'd boot them and fast.

I deleted his numbers from my phone.

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fact, it does hurt


This I understand. It's painful.


What I don't understand is what you are hoping to get from trying to read intent into his response. The very fact that you are trying to do that tells me you don't believe his responses are neccessarily truthful (understandable), and you were going to do that unless it was the answer you expected.

And if it had been the answer you expected, that would have been painful too, right?

So by asking the question, and trying to read intent, are you seeking to remain in pain?


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Nope. Definitely don't want pain. Nobody does.


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Sol, sorry to hear about all the latest development. Personally, I'm of the mindset that nothing good will come out of knowing more so in this particular case the less I know the better and easier it'll be for me to move on.

As for the girl, it's irrelevant *who* she is? If she is her or someone else from your perspective it changes nothing. It'll only torture you in the future. Don't do that to yourself.

If deleting his number helps you limit your communication with him then I'm glad you did it.

Remember, you deserve better, just like what I wrote to Brena yesterday.


Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6
Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks
Aug 2006, left again
Apr 2007, filed for divorce
Dec 2007, reunited
Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
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^ Yep. All of the #s have been deleted. I think it's in my best interest. And it does not matter who she is or if he's dating someone.

I just spoke to a relative who advised me had I been going to church, etc. that maybe God would have changed stbx's heart and I wouldn't be going through a D. I do believe and I do pray though I don't consider myself very religious. That comment was like pouring salt in the wound.

I have another exam tomorrow and need to get in the mindset to study for it.

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That comment was like pouring salt in the wound.


That comment was a criticism of your church attendance frown Nice.


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Originally Posted By: TimeHeals
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That comment was like pouring salt in the wound.


That comment was a criticism of your church attendance frown Nice.



Wow, those people are still out there! Sol, even if you had been going to church regularly "friends" like this would still be telling you your faith wasn't strong enough or you're sinning in some way etc. There's no winning with people who think this way, so don't worry about them...just forgive them and move on. smile


Divorced February 27, 2012.

"Only by love is love awakened".~ Ellen G White
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