That's what I am wondering. I "made the moves" on my H and he seemed to enjoy it. I am still wondering how attracted he is to me. Not a good feeling at all.
Piecing requires so much patience it's unbelievable. I think the next year of piecing will be harder than the last three months before we really started. This is a day in, day out struggle to enjoy the good, forgive the bad, and move forward, step by step. And it doesn't help when you really feel like you've lost out on the last several years of your life, and you're in a rush to make up for that lost time.
As Sandi told me (what seems a long time ago), patience can be learned...
From what I can tell... "Piecing starts" when the "problem" is exposed and you work on your marriage both in yourself and with your spouse... How long does piecing last? I truly believe it last as long as you are married. I think part of the problem with a marriage that got all of us here in the first place was taking marriage for granted. It will always be a "work in progress" from now on. I learn something new all of the time both with my wife and with me. It's ok to make mistakes as long as you learn by them. Insanity is trying the same thing over and over and expecting a different result...
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
It's surprising when you can make a change in your relationship dynamics. On Friday, my wife had planned on going out with some coworkers for drinks after work since a colleague was moving on to another job. I came home a bit early to watch our Ds, said goodbye to W and spent the night having fun with my daughters.
Turns out my W had a "predrink" with one of her girlfriends at 3pm, then picked up our kids from school. Strike one.
Next, while she never said when she'd be home, she implied that it would be around 7-8. She comes home, with no phone call, at 11:20pm. Strike two.
When she comes in, I'm watching a movie, and can smell booze before she even sits next to me. After a few minutes talking to her, it's pretty apparent that she's hammered, and that she drove herself home. Strike three.
Now, I'm no teetotaler. I like a drink when it's a good time, but I'm death on drunk driving. So normally this would have resulted in a huge blowout, either right then, or in the morning. But we went to bed, talked for a while, and I realized it wouldn't be a good time to bring it up.
When we woke up, I didn't wait very long to tell her that I was upset about last night; picking up our girls after drinking, staying out later than planned without a phone call, and driving drunk. I was calm, just expressed my concerns, and she listened without getting defensive. She apologized, didn't make any excuses, and it was over. No hard feelings, I didn't feel angry, she didn't feel controlled.
Kind of how I always envisioned a healthy relationship would deal with a problem.
Ugh. W is out of town for a week visiting a GF and then her sister. I'm Mr. Mom, (which is great) but I realize how much I miss her. It's good that I've been so busy; hopefully the week will pass quickly.
Ugh. W is out of town for a week visiting a GF and then her sister. I'm Mr. Mom, (which is great) but I realize how much I miss her. It's good that I've been so busy; hopefully the week will pass quickly.
So, what GAL activities do you have planned for the week pinhead? (Other than taking care of the munchkins of course)
I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.
I have company coming over for dinner tomorrow, finishing an article that's due, working out and training for a 5K. Then the weekend to catch up on chores. Exciting stuff! Actually I like all that. It's just that W and I have been spending all our nights together watching movies etc for the last couple of weeks, and I've grown accustomed to that. Need to remember that when she comes home; need to keep some nights to myself whenever possible.
