A new beginning to an end

[CityGirl]

Think about it... if he wasn't nervous about the outcome as far as the assets go he wouldn't be texting you at all.

When negotiating making the first move after one set of negotiations has failed is the biggest sign of weakness. Never show your cards. He has reached out to you several times in less than 24 hours. People who are comfortable in their stance don't do that.

No more talking, e-mailing or texting. Like most manipulative and wimpy men (I happen to be an expert in this area as I have had 13 years of experience with such a man he is shaking in his boots because his usual tactics are not working on you any longer. Of course he is going to blame you.

Divorce equals court. Period. Some rare cases work out before court but not many. Do not make ANY more offers to him via any medium and let him make the offers first to your attny. You already said his attny is not good - lol!

You don't ASK for what you want - you say what you want and allow them to offer you enough until you are satisfied with the settlement. Your attny will do this for you.

He is doing just what D did - making it out to be YOUR fault since you won't cave. Sorry, you are done being dictated to.

How are you feeling since your accident?

[soleil]

Hey CG. Excellent advice, all of it. I really really think you should look into being a L and life coach.

I am feeling much better after my accident. Thanks for asking. I did have a neck spasm but nothing major. Am thankful the damage to myself & car weren't way worse

I did throw out another # to my H on the phone but he said No way. So it was his offer or bust. Oh well. Guess the courts will decide now. I told him "You took me to court Friday to sue me." And he said, "It's not "suing. That's not how I understand it."

HA
HA
HA

If this wasn't my M I would make a comedy about it!

Like most manipulative and wimpy men (I happen to be an expert in this area as I have had 13 years of experience with such a man

Hehe.

Do not make ANY more offers to him via any medium and let him make the offers first to your attny.

I will follow this advice to a T.

[soleil]

Am meeting up with some girlfriends later for drinks though I won't stay long because I have a lab in the a.m. Will be nice to go out since I never go anywhere.

[brenalim]

Sounds like fun sol... that's how you do it! Enjoy the girl time and your tasty beverages!

[ImprovedRomeo]

And when you need boy time just call up your lab partner and do the lab experiments together.

No...not really.

Enjoy the drinks though!

[CityGirl]

Have fun, Sol!

[BobbiJo]

And when you need boy time just call up your lab partner and do the lab experiments together.

No...not really.

Enjoy the drinks though!

Ummmm, why not really? Didn't you say he was cute, sol?? Have fun with the girls' night!!

[ImprovedRomeo]

Sol certainly can if she chooses to but at least from my own experience I can say I was/am VERY vulnerable to a heartbreak.

But then I'm a rare species, a lot of people can date and have certain types of relationships without letting emotions play any part in it and if so then I'd imagine it'd be easier.

[soleil]

Sol certainly can if she chooses to but at least from my own experience I can say I was/am VERY vulnerable to a heartbreak.

I hear exactly what you are saying. By that same token, being vulnerable to heartbreak is not an issue for me since I am currently heartbroken. Opening myself up to the possibility of another one on top of this one seems like suicide.

Am a little sentimental today. My weekend has been good but tiring. Another one of my friends got married yesterday. It was a beautiful, small ceremony, very simple. I was thinking, that is 3 friends of mine who have married since D papers got filed/rolling. It made me kind of sad but of course I am happy for everyone and their new futures/life together. We celebrated my parents' bdays and the DJ played both of my wedding songs back to back.

Lab partner and I grabbed a bite to eat between class and lab and he was saying he wanted to know more about me, yada yada. I think he has a little crush. Which is flattering but so not where I'm at. He even texted me later saying "I bet you look beautiful at the wedding" and said he really enjoyed spending time with me.

And all this time I am thinking, my h doesn't even want to be with me and thinking of dating and starting all over again one day with someone else (should that ever happenn) is mentally exhausting.

I am tired of crying. I am tired of feeling depressed. And feeling like a f-ck up failure. I am tired of waking up in bed and looking to H's side of the bed and thinking H will never be in it again. I want to burn that bed and the covers. I don't want to sleep in it anymore. I just want to feel better already.

On the flip side ...at least I am alive and kicking.

[ImprovedRomeo]

Sorry you're feeling down Sol, it happens. It's OK to have these thoughts but you have to allow yourself only a limited time to acknowledge them and then move on. I know it's all very difficult and it sucks that so many of us have to go through this. Unfortunately we HAVE to go through this hurt and grieving to get to a better place and you're getting closer to that place.

Have you found any relevant books or perhaps a C to help with the process? ADs can help make this difficult process from turning into a monumental process.

Besides attending the wedding ceremonies what else are you doing to stay busy and keep your mind off of these thoughts.

Lab partner and I grabbed a bite to eat between class and lab and he was saying he wanted to know more about me, yada yada. I think he has a little crush. Which is flattering but so not where I'm at. He even texted me later saying "I bet you look beautiful at the wedding" and said he really enjoyed spending time with me.

Ya think?

Hey at least you're getting attention from the opposite sex...that's gotta count for something.