Perhaps I'm a bit odd, but I don't have friends that betray me. I don't have friends that lie to me. And I certainly don't have friends that are actively trying to break up my kid's family. I've read too much research that documents the effects of divorce on children to sit and play nice with someone that is compromising my kid's furture.
I can be civil even to people I despise. It takes some work though.
Not odd at all. True friends don't do any of that. Friends stand by their friends, support them in crisis. some even give their lives for their friends.
The last thing WAS is, is a friend. We are willing to take back their freindship if they reconcile with us until then it's just being friendly. There is a huge difference and drawing that line is a part of letting go. That is one of the reasons why letting go is so hard, we still view them as friends despite what they have done.
So, I worry about her and I believe that she would not be hurting us like this if she was not hurting more than any of us. Thus, my dilemma.
You are the lifeguard. Your wife and your daughter are in the water. Your wife is drowning and refuses your help. She wants to pull you under. What are you going to do?
I would have to save myself so I can save my daughter.
A lifeguard would be able to save her without letter her pull him under. Any way to do that, or do you have to abandon her and just let her drown?
How deep is the water?
As long as it is over your head, it doesn't matter if it is 15 ft or 1,500 ft. You will still drown.
Or if it's 3 feet you can just let her stand on her own when she figures it out. She's not going to die if you let her go. But you do need to take care of yourself first. Her problems are her problems.
If you try to rescue then she is focused on fighting your efforts. Let her learn to swim for her own benefit.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I don't see anywhere in Coach's scenario that you are in the water. How do you know how deep it is? W told you that ?
Coach said she is trying to pull me under.
We've probably extended this analogy as far as practical.
You're right. If it happened in the bathtub I would grab my daughter and ask the wife to get her a$$ up.
Suppose it was a high end Japanese toliet?
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
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