Because that's how men handle things. Be business like, efficient, passionate but not emotional about the outcome and sure of yourself.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Stop asking to do things for her. Your wife can ask for help if she needs it.
I understand. should have asked: How long have the dogs been alone since you left?
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This combined with her staying up at night on the computer getting a finger workout while you sleep and not ML for over a year is not good. What intel do youy have?
This one is more complicated than it looks. My intel tells me that there is no PA, but is is a possiblility that it's a EA. They have been friends and clients for years.
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Seriously you are worried about your dogs? The dogs can handle it.
Yes, I am a little and I am worried about the whole thing. The purpose of the vacation was suppose to be to get away from work and home and relax. Have family members pop in for day trips and read books.
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That would make you look silly.
You're right. Should just tell her to have a good time.
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So you can approve?
What choice do I have - I have to agree with her, don't I?
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You need to do some intel gathering, talk to a L and have a plan - how to let her go.
I have beem doing plenty of intel gathering. Stopped for awhile because besides silly friendly texts and meetings over a drink with friends, there was nothing there.
I am working on a plan, but it's not easy to come up who I think should leave. I don't trust her with the house and the dogs but it's part of the single life she needs to cope with. On the other hand I won't mind at all to stay with it all and let her leave.
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ps She can get you to jump any time she wants by telling you the dogs need you. Let her care for the dogs.
So should I tell her that I cannot do the swap as I originally agreed to. Reason? Can't take a day off? Or be honest and say that I do not think it is appropriate for me to be used as a delivery boy?
The purpose of the vacation was suppose to be to get away from work and home and relax.
that's what she said, what do her actions tell you she wants.
she know's you to well yet you don't know her. she's bored, she's not attracted to you, she's going out drinking and talking with other men, she's throwing a party with all her new friends and you aren't invited. you should be worried.
time for some action on your part
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Her actions tell me that she wants to go and relax in peace and have some dogs with her. She has her mother and aunt come and visit for a day (different days). She invited me for a day and overnight stay as well.
The party is the last Friday before she leaves. The usual friends from work including her bosses and couple of good clients. I don't see too much wrong with that other than the fact that she is burned out from work and wanted to get away. And truly I don't like my dogs being there in the midst of all the chaos of a party. They are not off-leash dogs and I can see a accident in the making. When we have had a lot of people in the house it was always difficult to host while watching every move. Who leaves the front door open, who wonders through the garage, etc.
But you are right, there is time for action from my part. Just have to figure out how to get my mojo back.
Her actions tell me that she wants to go and relax in peace and have some dogs with her.
Then why is she having a party without you?
Never told me what kind of dogs you own.
How come you never married?
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I don't know. Maybe she wanted to show off at the end of her vacation. Mabel she knows she'll be bored by then. I am not invited because for some audience we are not a couple right now.
We had 2 beagles, beagle/Lhasa apso mix and a havanese. One beagle died recently and we got a cavalier king Charles spaniel.
I just put my DNA and a fingerprint on this forum.
I was married once before and we started dating while my divorce was being processed. She asked me once back then but obviously it was not a right time. Later we both decided that it was not a necessary as long as our commitment was there. Neither of us wanted children so it really was not important.
Although I have very moral values I don't see myself as a sinner. I respect God but I know he would not mind.
I am not invited because for some audience we are not a couple right now.
Things that make you go hmmmm?
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She asked me once back then but obviously it was not a right time.
Obvious to you, she wanted to get married.
Let go of some of your pre-conceived notions about your woman and woman in general.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Not really. Since the bomb, there has been quite a few social events involving coworkers. Some we attended but she was quite distant back then. So we stopped that. People started wondering and she told the closest friends that we had problems. Word got out and the rest is what it is.
For the audience that does not know anything, we are still together and okay, that includes family as well.
She never wanted our issue to become public. I got heavily criticized when I reached out to her mother. She did not even want her to know.
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Obvious to you, she wanted to get married.
Yes, she did and I did too, but the timing was wrong and we decided to talk about it later. When later came we both felt that it was not important any more. We joked that we can have many vacations with the money we would spend on a wedding.
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Let go of some of your pre-conceived notions about your woman and woman in general.
Yes, she did and I did too, but the timing was wrong and we decided to talk about it later. When later came we both felt that it was not important any more. We joked that we can have many vacations with the money we would spend on a wedding.
Pookie, you have the same skills at insight into women that I have. NONE. You need to understand what she was saying then, why, and how that has led you to Aug 26th, 2011.
Hindsight is 20/20. There are lot of things that I've done wrong and lot of things she has done wrong too. Unfortunately right now I am the only one in this R who is trying to learn and figure out how to move on. For her the past only holds negativity and I am the source of her misery.
There are a few more things she never forgave me for and I never saw them as an issue until she pointed them out years later.
It was all in communication and my inability to read her and listen to her. When she talked I should have translated it but I did not have a dictionary.
