Thanks for the info Pup. I was on that site earlier.
I feel I should continue to put it all on the table. Last attempt to R. If she quickly says no then I will no she doesn't see a future in us. If she is hesitant than maybe that could be a door unclosed yet and worth looking into.
I didn't come this far to give up.
Last edited by gr8 day 2B alive; 08/24/1007:03 PM.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Dude. She's ASKING YOU TO SIGN THE DIVORCE PAPERS. She has no interest in reconciling with you right now. You can either give her what she wants or stall her, but asking her "one last time to reconcile" will be seen as weak and supplicating and NOT at all attractive!
Then I will sign the papers with a smile on my face.
I do know if you don't ask for something you never receive it.
Thanks for the 2x4. I needed it.
Last edited by gr8 day 2B alive; 08/24/1007:13 PM.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Gr8, I agree with Puppy. Once I got served I knew it was basically one year until it was final. So I was already dead and had nothing to lose. What I did know was that what I was doing wasn't working. Solution: become attractive without pursuing. My goals became for me to get her to come to me. She asked me out, she showed the first affection, she initated ML , she told me she wanted to do the work to reconcile. I learned what I could about attraction, the differences in communication, I stayed busy, I wanted her to spew on me, I was aware of what she needed and why. Then I used what I had learned and tried things a little bit at a time. It amazed me when things worked just like I had been told (Because my sitch was unique just like everybody else's.) You do have to let go, it's a game changer.
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Right Coach, just b/c I sign the papers doesn't mean I don't stop working on me. If she notices it great, if not, it wasn't meant to be.
As I wrote that last post I thought of the Stockdale paradox.
I think about it quite often.
Quote:
It amazed me when things worked just like I had been told (Because my sitch was unique just like everybody else's.)
Aren't the all???
I get it. Keep working on me and learning about communicating with woman. learn to see things from their perspective and respond in a manner that they would appreciate. Stay true to my character and do not let my morals or values be compromised.
Take control of my family by leading them to a healthy and fulfilling life. Have my opinions about things even if they conflict with hers. It's OK to disagree and even argue, as long as it's done in a loving way.
Don't get caught up with all the negatives things she does and do focus on a healthy R.
OH yeah, be happy with myself especially when around W. Radiate a postive aura. This is why am still come here. thanks guys!
Last edited by gr8 day 2B alive; 08/24/1007:27 PM.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Thanks for the info Pup. I was on that site earlier.
I feel I should continue to put it all on the table. Last attempt to R. If she quickly says no then I will no she doesn't see a future in us. If she is hesitant than maybe that could be a door unclosed yet and worth looking into.
I didn't come this far to give up.
Glad the guys put in their opinions... I was about to pull me a big ole piece of lumber to swing atcha! lol
They are so right... doing anything other than signing right now will be seen as spineless and controlling. Asking her to reconcile will just prove to her that you haven't moved at all.
I know you realize that by now--I just thought I'd chime in with the female perspective here.
Keep on steppin' my friend.
And CYA while you are doing it, kay?
Last edited by beingreal; 08/25/1002:34 AM. Reason: I'm a dork
formerly known as "shelbel" Me 40, stbxh 40 DSs 9, 7 & 3 M9, T10 Stbxh is a diagnosed bipolar & an addict. The end.
BR, thanks for stopping by. And it's nice to get a woman's perspective on things too.
I'll make sure I have my pen handy when the mail comes!
Looking forward to a 4 day holiday weekend next week with the kids!! Then D5 goes to school!
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
My MSN page has a story on it about Elin Woods: Tiger Woods' ex-wife tells People magazine that the stress of the sex scandal consumed her, causing weight loss, insomnia & more.
Welcome to the club!
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
, she told me she wanted to do the work to reconcile. I learned what I could about attraction, the differences in communication, I stayed busy, I wanted her to spew on me, I was aware of what she needed and why. Then I used what I had learned and tried things a little bit at a time. It amazed me when things worked just like I had been told (Because my sitch was unique just like everybody else's.) 
