Good vibes are a lot better than bad ones, She sent me a text this mroning asking me not to forget her longhorns over the front door, and also not to break them, those coments get to me, if she is worried about me braking them she should get them herself. I will reply in a little bit with I will grab them. any other thoughts on the previous page??? our text convo and the phone call?
I do not have comments so much on the contents of the TMs or the phones calls. I would probably try to avoid to many TMs or phones at this point and time. I think you are making yourself to available to her.
I would let her find out that she does not have you there every time that she needs you.
ME-41 W-33 M-8 D-8 S-4 D 5/17/2010 www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1961097#Post1961097
she has been texting me more, she also sent a video from her backyard of a family of ducks near a pond. Thought that was a bit odd. I responded back 30 mins later saying the ducks are cute and you picked a good place. I do not respond to everything, I know I need to be less available to her, but at the same time, I am trying to be cordial. This is where I get torn, I am trying to balance being a good father and just a good person in general, funny and nonconfrontational. Am i doing too much right now? it seems to be getting positive results and no arguments. I dont bring anything up regarding the D(in process) or the R at all.
Dont know what it means TH, sometimes I feel she does things to keep me around, just in case she changes her mind. Other times I think she is being nice so we are civil through all of this. I read other threads where the WAW is angry and bitter and does not initiate any contact or do anything nice for the LBS, W has not been that way after she left, she has been reaching out a little bit. I guess I could be reading too much into it, but that little bit of hope says they are good signs, but again I keep my expectations near 0 and tell my self the D is around the corner.
. I guess I could be reading too much into it, but that little bit of hope says they are good signs, but again I keep my expectations near 0 and tell my self the D is around the corner.
Based on my biased experience, all it definetly means is that there is some attatchment.
Attatchment alone will not bring your wife back or save your marriage.
I am proof of that. You wife is another woman, however, so we shall see how it works on her.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
Yes I agree. There still is attachment on both sides. So is it safe to say, if the attachment is still there, and I be the attractive fun loving guy, it can rekindle things? It does make me happier to be that way anyway. So I guess I cant lose if I keep doing what I am doing with zero expectations. I will not let her run my show, she can run her show the way she wants.
I am not going to be readily available to her, she is getting space, and she needs to miss me, for the good things in me, that is what I display in her presence.
There still is attachment on both sides. So is it safe to say, if the attachment is still there, and I be the attractive fun loving guy, it can rekindle things?
It's never a good idea to assume or expect anything.
What I am getting at is that any changes you go through are for you only... because they will enable you to feel better about yourself and who you are. Take the focus off trying to manipulate her. Be a better man because it's the right thing to do.
As far as your wife goes, it's not so much about any hoops you jump through or contortions you twist yourself up into to please her.
There is attatchment. There may be more: her principles, her idea of motherhood, and so on that work in your favor.
But stop acting like a trained circus dog trying to impress the audience with new tricks. Become the charming, confident guy you can be, and let her work the rest out.
It's why we say protect yourself if you need to, but don't be an @ss about it. Think "Cary Grant".
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
